red is the new black

we're not dead

2006-10-20T11:00:00.000+01:00

but we havent posted for about a million years, sorree...

the change of weather/general poorness/feeling shit has stopped us caring enough to post. but today i was kind of inspired on the bus, by something really silly.

it was pissing down with rain, PISSING DOWN, so everyone looked gloomy, wet, grumpy, generally unhappy.

the bus drivers in london have these little speaker things where they say 'next stop oxford circus' or whatever, and this guy was really chatty and kept getting it wrong, 'here we are at oxford circus, no no no, its bond street sorry!' and stuff, which was quite amusing in itself.

then he did'nt realise he'd left the speaker on between stops, and the whole bus could hear him as he whistled and hummed at the wheel. it was really simple but people started giggling and smiling at each other. it wasnt like we'd caught him doing anything bad, he'd just left the speaker on and been whistling away at the wheel driving through puddles on oxford street.

it made me do a big smile. so for that i thank you Mr Bus Driver, for unknowingly sharing lots of smiles this rainy morning. thats what its all about really isnt it?

peace out blog fans xxx

Hair care is the new black

2006-10-12T15:36:00.000+01:00

Welcome back!!

Its our healthy-hair survival guide: all it takes is a little TLC to start each day with vibrant, luxuriant hair. Even on a budget we have learnt that it is possible to give our hair the pampering we deserve!!

We have been turning heads with simple, free changes:

Massage the scalp every day, when shampooing or when watching TV, it feels nice and its good for the scalp and hair yay!
Moisturize and condition your hair right to the ends at night, it feels amazing in the morning! Miss Red just commented on my shiney hair last week, and i'd done this!!
Once a week DEEP-TREAT After shampooing, take a few more minutes to condition your hair with deep treatments. Hot oil or rich, creamy hair masks, Pop on a plastic cap (or an old tesco bag in my case, yeah classy i know!) and let the conditioner sink in ten to 15 minutes before you rinse. or however long you want, clean the house with the bag on and nice loud music, its a good look!!
HANDLE WITH CARE, its simple but its crazy the damage that can be done to hair by pulling and tugging it too aggressively when it's wet, a nice simple comb adn some conditioner always helps!

Heres some natural, cheap ways to make your own hair masks!! i love it!!!

1. Olive Oil Hair MaskMix
5 tablespoon of olive oil with 2 eggs. Apply throughly to hair. Wrap head with plastic wrap or a shower cap. After 15 minutes rinse well.

2. Honey & Olive Oil Hair Mask
Mix 2 tablespoon honey with 3 tablespoon olive oil. Apply throughly to hair. Cover hair with plastic wrap or a shower cap. After 15 minutes shampoo and rinse well.

3. Beautiful Gorgeous Hair Mask
After you shampoo your hair, pour 1 cup fresh lemon juice or vinegar through hair and massage and rinse with water. Apply your usual conditioner and wash with water. It will remove all the dirt and your hair will be shine sparkling.

4. Hair Rinse for soft and shiny hair Mix
1 Tbsp of following herbs with enough boiling water and let it stand for 1/2 an hour. Add 1/4 cup apple cider vinegar and mix well. Shampoo your hair. Pour mixture over hair repeatedly. Vinegar will seal the hair cuticle.
Use the herbs as following:
For hair general care: rosemary leaves, nettle, burdock root, elder flowersFor dry hair: chamomile flowers, comfrey root, nettle, elder flowers
For oily hair: lemon peel, , peppermint, lemongrass

5. Shining Hair Mix
juice of one fresh orange, water, 1 tablespoon Honey and a few drops (5-7) of sandalwood oil. Use as an after-shampoo rinse. Beat two eggs in a tablespoon of milk and apply on your hair. Rinse your hair after 5-7 minutes to get an instant shining.Add a 2 tablespoons of apple cider vinegar in water and rinse your hair.

6. For Damaged Hair
Mash a ripe banana with a few drops of almond oil and massage into hair. Leave it for about 15 minutes. Rinse with soda water and then shampoo and condition.

7. Dry HairMix
1 tablespoon of honey in half cup of full cream milk. Massage on the scalp and leave it for 15 minutes. Wash with a mild shampoo.

Try one of these we recommend it!! it feels a bit silly walking around witha bag on your head, but your hair will thank you for it, and as have mentioned before, great hair = great career/life/relationships/everything! get mixing ladies!!!

lunch and sky for freeeeeeee!!!wweeeeeeeee!!!

2006-10-08T12:06:00.000+01:00

another fine home made lunch, man im getting good at this saving money business.

lunch with miss r the other day. id brought a home made lunch, so i went all out cheeky and just bought a drink in the pub and ate from my tuppaware while she had her meal. pikey!!!

just to get all hippy on you. look up people. the sky is amazing!!!!!!!!! and its freeeeee!! weeeeeee!!

miss cr.z.y. black

Miss Blacks Weekly Spend....

2006-09-29T15:48:00.000+01:00

i cant believe its this time again.
again.
its always purse watch with you isnt it??!! ahhhhhhhhh!!!

ok, here goes:

sat 23rd oct:
i teach 3-6 yr olds dancing on sats, so i had to stock up on stickers:
£3
50p - a banana
£10 - oyster card top up (i always seem to be doing this! how expensive is london travel?!)
went on a DISASTER of a 'surprise' date with my boyfriend. (his brother called me and said 'what time are you going to the theatre?' so i realised it was the theatre. it was a 6 hour round trip to see a really bad production of romeo and juliet. gutted.
anyway, ended up spendings lots, petrol/food/drinks.
including a small drama where aforementioned boyfriend took his fish and chips back (embarrassing!!) anyway i probably spent
£25 ish

sunday 24th oct:
£15 tesco (tired and grumpy at work after crap night)
worked til midnight got taxi home.

monday 25th oct:
£650 rent out, booo!!!
£5 lunch

tues 26th oct:
£37 boots, mmmm

weds 27th oct:
£15 tesco
£27 mooncup

thursday 28th oct:
£7.50 yoga
£4 boots essential cystitis heeeelp
£25 a nice bit of cashmere from miss selfridge

friday 29th oct:
NOTHING YEEET!
probably 2 cranberry juices in the pub £5

total:
£829

doing well then.

miss black

Miss Red's Weekly Spend - w/beg Sept 23rd

2006-09-29T13:44:00.000+01:00

Saturday 23rd

£157 - travel card (for the month)
£8.80 - lunch w/ JB
£50.12 - Waitrose
£9.50 - books from charity shop
£5 - cab home

--------------

Sunday 24th
Nothing

--------------

Monday 25th
£2 - tea and a bagel

--------------

Tuesday 26th

£1 - bagel
£13.40 - cinema

--------------

Wednesday 27th
£2 - tea and a bagel
£20.85 - 2 tickets to see The Blood Arm in December
£58 - mobile phone bill
£21.91 - 30th birthday present for KF

--------------

Thursday 28th
£2 - tea and a bagel
£6 - lunch w/ FFLH
45p - Maltesers
£4.60 cab home (it was raining and pitch black, I needed a pick me up, literally!)

--------------

Friday 29th
£2 - tea and a bagel
£4.75 - Paperchase (birthday gubbins for KF)

--------------

Total - £369.37
Money saved by not smoking - £35

--------------

Ooops...

It gets worse...

In my defence, if you take off the travel card (necessity!) I did spend less than last week. Still not good enough though, I know

I will try harder. I will try harder. I will try harder.

Miss Red x

Good advice: Britons in most debt

2006-09-29T13:36:00.000+01:00

Stumbled across this article on the Radio 1 website. Bit of a wake up call after the recent talk of soap on a rope and Moon Cups and reminded us why we started this blog.

(Note from Miss Red: To Liza "I've never had a credit or store card, even when I was at uni. I was brought up understanding that you can't have and only buy what I can afford. How difficult is it to say no to a credit card?!" Get fucked you sanctimonious bitch...)

Is it safe?

2006-09-29T13:23:00.000+01:00

*crawls out from under rock and dusts self off*

That was scary man. Can't cope with all this peace and love crap. I'm a Londoner born and bred so consider eye contact an act of overt aggression. I don't do well with poetry and public displays of affection. And let's not even mention the Moon Cup...

*shudder*

Thank God the bitch is back. God bless cystitis!

Miss Red x

ok, the bitch is back...

2006-09-29T11:05:00.000+01:00

...i'm still standing by my choices of hippy poetry and talk of mooncups (which arrived last night btw) but the bitch is back.

with a mighty chip on her shoulder. i have been stuck down by an uncontrollable force of nature. well i suppose it is controllable if i hadnt drank 2 glasses of pink wine. i only had TWO fucking glasses, and i get it. the bastard that is cystitis, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh,
hardly sleapt.
nothing you can do but drink shit loads of water and cranberry juice and wee alot. its likes fire. fire. ahhhhhhhhhhhhh.

so right now the hippy shit takes a back seat. until i can even take a seat for more than 2 mintues without weeing.

AAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

*thanks you for letting me vent that*

miss black x

Welcome to Tie Dye is the New Black!

2006-09-28T16:44:00.000+01:00

Poetry? Really? Has it come to this?

There's far too much 'love in the room' and Miss Red, still reeling from the 'Mooncup incident', refuses to post until the bitchiness resumes...

"Fucking hippies..." she muttered, swinging a soap on a rope for protection.

We heart Maya Angelou & Patricia Lynn Reilly

2006-09-28T16:16:00.000+01:00

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I'm not cute or built to suit a fashion model's size
But when I start to tell them,
They think I'm telling lies.
I say,
It's in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.
I say,
It's the fire in my eyes,
And the flash of my teeth,
The swing in my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can't touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them
They say they still can't see.
I say,
It's in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman

Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Now you understand
Just why my head's not bowed.
I don't shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It's in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
the palm of my hand,
The need of my care,
'Cause I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

- Maya Angelou

-----------------------
Imagine a Woman

Imagine a woman who believes it is right and good she is a woman.
A woman who honours her experiences and tells her stories.
Who refuses to carry the sins of others within her body and life.

Imagine a woman who trusts and respects herself.
A woman who listens to her needs and desires.
Who meets them with tenderness and grace.

Imagine a woman who has acknowledged the past's influence on the present.
A woman who has walked through her past.
Who has healed into the present.

Imagine a woman who authors her own life.
A woman who exerts, initiates, and moves on her won behalf.
Who refuses to surrender except to her truest self and wisest voice.
A woman who names her own Gods.
A woman who imagines the divine in her image and likeness.
Who designs a personal spirituality to inform her daily life.

Imagine a woman in love with her own body.
A woman who believes her body is enough, just as it is.
Who celebrates her body rhythms and cycles as an exquisite resource.

Imagine a woman who honours the body of the Goddess in her changing body.
A woman who celebrates the accumulation of her years and her wisdom.
Who refuses to use her precious life energy disguising the changes in her body and life.

Imagine a woman who values the women in her life.
A woman who sits in circles of women.
Who is reminded of the truth about herself when she forgets.

Imagine yourself as this woman.

- Patricia Lynn Reilly author of: A God Who Looks Like Me

The future of the blog...

2006-09-27T14:28:00.000+01:00

we were discussing this the other day, thought you may be interested in where we're taking this bloggeroony.
it kind of stemed from us both reading an article in the observer woman supplement on women blogging about their sex lives.

Miss Red (MR) says:
have been thinking about the blog after reading that article
Miss Black (MB) says:
...
MR says:
couple of similarities between the blogs in the article:
1) took 2 years to take off, 2) all by women and 3) all about sex!
I think our blog is great but what do we have to make people come back every day
that's what we need to identify
MB says:
yeah i dont wanna fall in thier trap,we dont need sex to sell,i think they're a diff genration of bloggers,we wanna be the next step
MR says:
I agree
MB says:
simple things like knitting are things that pull people in
MR says:
but we need that pull and I can't think what it is/will be
MB says:
knitting tips/smoothie recipes etc
MR says:
yeah
MR says:
cheap food receipes like my lentil soup!
MB says:
exactly!!simple is key, i think it'd be lovely to be so british and sweet that we dont need to sell out with sex and drugs stories but be content in aprons, cakes, knitting and traditional stuff!!
in a kitch camp fun way, the kids are much more in touch with homely things now
MR says:
that's a great idea! stiching and bitching innit
MB says:
i think we're the 7/11 generation who have all been a bit shocked and knocked by terrorsim etc and are looking inside to what its all about a bit more, wanna make our mums proud
MR says:
a return to tradtional roles, I know the mums I know are all about that rather than rushing back to work to prove they can have it all
MB says:
yeah its about standing tall and saying yes we CAN have it all, but we CHOOSE tradtional.
not in a non girl power way
MR says:
fuck girl power
MB says:
but in more power through this
MR says:
exactly
MB says:
i think this is a much clearer angle, that we can both do naturally.

I feel like in someway together we can make a nice impact through this blog. i cant be bothered to log on and write about intimate sex/drugs/filth stories. thats been done. this is a ladies blog, about the struggles of everyday living and making ends meet. but ultimately having it all, through fabulous friends, family and positive thoughts for the future.

i tried to explain what blogging is about to my cousin, who gets impatient even checking his emails. its very difficult to engage someone like that into this world. but i hope that as time evolves there will become more excepted, easier ways of communicating that don't involve being sat at a screen, then my friends, the future will truely have arrived! and i'll be there in a delorian going '1.21 jigawatts, ha ha ha ha!!!'

i'd love it if one day a blog could be read like a newspaper or a book, or read to us somehow. so that we wouldnt have to be sat at desks/screens that hurt our eyes. and so that we could be active! my god the hours ive wasted sat at this bloody desk. i just want to be up and moving. but still communicating in this incredible way. and thats where the future lies. reading a blog whilst on a running machine, sending an email whilst doing yoga, reading a news website whilst doing the ironing. its in all these things that i cant wait.

people that say 'computers are the death of our society', have a very good point. but im hopeful and very positive that the future is bright. the future means greater contact, healthier bodies, more education, knowledge, patience, understanding and love. i cant help but feel like things have to get better, maybe thats the essence that keeps me going. maybe its the underlying truth my hippy of a mummy has installed in me. maybe im just hiding from the dark truth that things really arent so rosy.

whichever way, it keeps me smiling every day, it keeps me looking up to the blue sky and knowing that there is a point to waking up in the morning, there is love in the world, seeing a big smile, laughter, children playing in the park, watching young love holding hands at the bus stop, knowing that wherever, whatever that bright light sun will rise every morning on a new day, a day for a fresh start, new beginnings. a new day where things will and can only get better.

my fave quote of the day:

"i am not afraid of tomorrow for i have seen yesterday and i love today"

dont read on if you're freaked out by 'lady things'

2006-09-27T13:00:00.000+01:00

its our 2 MONTH anniversay of our blog!!!
HURRAH!
How are we doing? are we spending any less? are we inspiring anyone else to spend less? are we genrally being good human beings??
we just had this IM conv, do not read on if you get queasy ready about tampax/lady parts/blood etc:

Red says:
how's the 'not spending any money' going?
Black says:
good so far and ive made lunch. you?
Red says:
I've bought gig tickets, paid my mobile bill and bought those sweets for my mate.
No tea or bagel and BYOed
Black says:
i bought 2 mooncups last night
Red says:
what's a mooncup?
Black says:
its like a tampon but lasts forever, or something. its a hippys tampax to save the world
Black says:
£18 and saves the environment, no more spending out of tampax, im trying it out!!
Red says:*scared face*
Black says:
i thought that too, but im up for trying it
Red says:
if that's what saving the enviornment and/or saving money is about you can fucking keep it, fuck that!
Black says:
mooncups are the way forward
Black says:
moonmoonmoon
Black says:
cupcupcup
Red says:
*pukes*
Red says:
where's the emoticons for I'M ABOUT TO LOSE MY BYO LUNCH?
Black says:
heeeeeeeeeee!!!
anyway on that note, enjoy your lunch!
Miss Black (hippy in chief)

Good Advice: Groucho Marx

2006-09-26T14:49:00.000+01:00

It frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy - Groucho Marx

1 MONTH BITCHES!

2006-09-26T12:29:00.000+01:00

That's right: I've made it a whole month without smoking!

Never thought I'd see the day.

Man, it feels good! If for no other reason than I can now stick two fingers up at all the people who said I couldn't do it.

I realise that spite isn't the best reason to give up smoking but I'm a stubborn, competitive bitch and if someone says I can't do something, I'll do it, just to prove them wrong.

Yes. I know. This is not healthy.

This anniversary also signals the end of me talking about giving up smoking all the time, I promise. It's business as usual from now on...nothing but talk of being broke and Wentworth Miller! *wink*

I see La Black has subccumed to Boots (most of you know my feelings on Boots, but if you don't read this). She warned me that she was going yesterday but then quickly said 'Please don’t try and talk me out of it. A new eye cream is all I've got left ' before I could disapprove. Besides, who the fuck am I to judge? I went to Boots 4 times last week (I went again on Saturday).

She's off to Boots again as I type, to get lunch with her Advantage Points. Here's a snippet of the convo we just had about it on IM:

ME: Gonna get a Bugsy? (yummy sandwich with grated carrot, houmous, watercress & sprouts)
HER: no, I'm over bread
ME: Bread is so 2005!
HER: 2006 is all about sushi...it's the new grey
ME: You mean, sushi is the new black
HER: no grey is the new black
ME: OK, so sushi is the new grey, which is the new black?
HER: precisely

*sigh*

Miss Red x

i'm a new woman.its amazing what a trip to boots can do.

2006-09-26T11:39:00.000+01:00

so i worked out yesterday i only had £84 to last me 2 weeks. but i spent £37 none the same on products in boots. do i regret it? hell no. i'm a new woman because of it. i went home and pampered myself, got a really good nights sleep and feel fabulous!

i got SO much stuff, god bless the multi buys and the buy one get one frees!

aloe and cucumber body lotion 2 for £3
cucumber eye gel £1.49 (boots own, just as good as branded ones)
cucmber face scrub £1.39 (as above!)
Boots henna deep hair conditioner BOGOF £1.98
Boots blonde shampoo and conditioner £1.39 each, save 78p for buying 2
Boots naturals night shift night cream reduced to £5.99
telescopic mascara reduced £6.99
pink blusher £4.75 reduced
Boots tinted moisturisor £3.99 reduced

and everything boots own was on triple points, so i now have £7.07 to spend with points. yay!

am i a complete geek? this has made me happy. i suppose its when everything else is a bit shakey, something like little treats from boots give me a temporary high. although my hair is so smooth and shiny this morning that this is no temporary high. i'm a new woman!!

shallow and proud,

miss black xx

wonders if going mad

2006-09-25T12:20:00.000+01:00

i like it when i dont have to think about spending.
i like to feel free to not buy economy bread and shampoo.
unfortunatley these are my budgets.
done the maths.
i have £84 to last me 2 full weeks.
i'm walking around half blind due to lack of contact lenses and lost glasses. *curses* i cant even see the screena s i type, so applogies if its wonky. i'm going to have to use emergency money for new glasses i cant go around blind, im actualyl going to risking my life cyclying home tonight. dont tell my mum.

dam me. dancing all night in a gay club so enthusiastically that i lost my glasses. this will be funny one day, not today. not as i sit with a grumbling tummy, moudling leftovers to look forward to for lunch, cold because my ballet pumps have got hoels in adn they soaked though with rain so i got wet feet, tired becasue im doing extra work on a sunday night to raise more funds so got about 4 hours sleep, and not even able to see my computer screen becasue i cant afford glasses.

its fun being a gorwn up.

would it be a major sin if i bought some nice products on my lunch break? just a nice littel face mask with something healing that would make me feel a million dollars, maybe a nice eye cream and a yummy moisturisor so i felt like a new woman? i promise i wont spend too muhc, i'll even get the boots own branded one. i wont spend over £15 i promise, i really think its a long term investment.

what the hell am i talking about? there are starving children in the world.
get a grip you fuckign freak.

im tired and talking to myself. in not a very ncie tone.

*cries a little*

*wonders if going mad*

*looks for publish button to post this goddam poor excuse for a blog/life*

miss blkac

As I've been so bad...

2006-09-22T17:28:00.000+01:00

I think I should be punished...

*raises eyebrow and smiles*

Miss Red x

Miss Red's Weekly Spend - w/beg Sept 16th

2006-09-22T17:11:00.000+01:00

Saturday 16th / Sunday 17th

£50 (in France - all in Euros can't be arsed to list)

--------------

Monday 18th

£6.30 - travel card

49p - chewing gum

£20.83 - Boots (nicotine patches)

£19.75 - M&S Food

£4.80 - cab

--------------

Tuesday 19th

Nothing (laid on the sofa all day watching Prison Break)

--------------

Wednesday 20th

£9.90 - travel card

£1 - bagel

£7.77 - HMV (I *needed* the new Secret Machines, Blood Arm and Larrikin Love singles!)

£4.85 - Boots

35p - chewing gum

£4.75 - lunch

--------------

Thursday 21st

£9.90 - travel card
£1 - bagel

£7.99 - Boots

£19.90 - Liberty (birthday present for the delightful FFLH)

£5 - lunch

£10 - dinner with friend

£5.20 - cab

--------------

Friday 22nd

£9.90 - travel card

£2 - tea and a bagel

£2.50 - Paperchase (birthday card for the delightful FFLH)

£5 - lunch

£40 - realistically, I'll probably spend this tonight at FFLH's birthday shenanigans inc. cab

--------------

Total - £249.18

Money saved by not smoking - £35

--------------

Ooops...

Yes, I went to Boots three times this week.

No, I didn't bring my lunch in at all.

Pay day comes and I go mad, again.

I am a bad girl. A very bad girl.

Miss Red x

Miss B's Weekly Spend - w/beg Sept 16th

2006-09-22T16:17:00.000+01:00

im feeling good about the whole spending thing.

a few months ago i had no idea what was in my account and when. admittedly i am still in my overdraft,in debt etc etc, but i KNOW it now, i have got past the denial stage. i check my online bank account almost daily, im still poor, but im aware of it, and am spending less accordingly.

the last few weeks have been mental cos ive had 2 friends staying. ive ended up spending more in the supermarket, getting beers in, takeaways etc. i love them, but now they're gone i feel like i can start a clean slate and sort out my finances/life. busy weekend ahead, then next week the flats getting a good clean, im gonna pull my socks up, sell some stuff on ebay, get organized and get a good job.

right here goes:

sat 16th sept:
£20 tesco food
£15 pizza takeaway
£10 taxi
went to a crimea gig, my brothers girlfriend sorted the drinks and entry (care of her company, nice!)
£10 taxi
£10 late night food!

sun 17th sept:
£15 train ticket to warwick to see the family
£20 threshers
£10 tescos food
£15 neds noodles takeaway, man i love the neds!
£5 icecream/choc run! its sunday!!

monday 18th:
£20 oyster
£15 ticket to brighton
£20 beers/pizza

tues 19th:
£20 tesco fruit and cold potions, sniff

weds 20th:
nought, poorly

thursday 21st:
£10 lunch
£7 cream tea at sketch
£15 pizza

friday 22nd:
£5 lunch
i'm hoping to spend £30 max tonight for FFLH's bday, including dinner with Miss Red and our fabulous friend (who we'll call Miss Legs, because shes all legs, lucky lady!)
i also have to go to popstarz for my boyfriends brothers birthday, so my spend might be increased due to club entry/drinks/taxi...oh dear)

total:
£272.

have a lovely weekend y'all.
love miss black x

Day 24: Get thee behind me nicotine!

2006-09-22T13:18:00.000+01:00

It is not the great temptations that ruin us; it is the little ones - John W. DeForest

Nearly smoked last night.

Went out for a meal with a friend and when I got home, I went online to pay a bill.

Whenever I'm on my laptop at home I chain smoke. I don't know why, I've always put it down to losing track of time, but I smoke about 5 an hour when I'm online.

So of course as soon as I sat down, I wanted a cigarette. The temptation was palpable and I could do nothing to distract myself from it

To be honest, if there were cigarettes in the house, I would have smoked. I'm ashamed to admit that, especially as I would be breaking for something so trivial, but I would have.

Of course I didn't. I paid my bill, logged off and went to bed, but I didn't sleep a wink. It scared the shit out of me. I cannot tell you why I wanted a cigarette so bad. Of all the things to tempt me; not after a meal or when I wake up...when I'm on the computer.

How ridiculous.

So now I'm in a state of mild panic because I'm going out tonight for FFLH's birthday shenanigans and it's going to be *carnage*! I fear I may not make it though the night.

Oh God help me...
Miss Red x

P.S. Christ they're playing 'On and On' by the Longpigs on 6Music, which always reminds me of an ex. It's official. Today is not a good day *weeps uncontrollably*

Good Advice: Marilyn Monroe

2006-09-21T12:19:00.000+01:00

I am not interested in money. I just want to be wonderful.

Day 22: I'm back bitches!

2006-09-20T17:35:00.000+01:00

Did you miss me?

Wish I could regale you all with tales of my fabulous trip away but truth be told, it was *hideous*!

It rained for the entire time we were there, I argued constantly with my Mum and it was far too religious for my liking.

That being said, I'm *still* not smoking so I think I deserve a medal.

Mum had a great time though, which was kinda the point of us going, so I can't really complain.

Especially as Bro and I managed to escape for a day and we went into the Pyrenees. It was breathtaking. I've never seen anything like it and I probably never will again. Made the whole ordeal worthwhile. Will post some pics when I get around to taking them off my camera.

I see that while I was away, I left you in the schizophrenic hands of Miss B. Bless her. Luckily for her the hippy/bitch thing is a strong look this season.

KIDDING!

I should be nice to Miss B, she's poorly ill again. Apparently her gays gave her a cold :(

Sending you healing vibes La Black. Feel better. Miss you!

Before I sign off, I have to give an honourable mention to the delightful FFLH as it's her birthday today!

Happy birthday my love. May you get everything you wish for. I know you're not reading this right now but some day you will.

And thank you for taking such good care of my house while I was away and for leaving the signed photo of Went you got me on my mantelpiece. It was exactly the welcome home I was hoping for!

Speaking of Mr Miller (as I seem to be a lot recently), I stumbled upon a random messageboard where several mentally instable women were talking about him.

It was hilarious and I had to share this message with you because it made me howl:

oh my god wentworth miller is the sexiest bloke on earth i almost faint watching him on prison break even just thinking about him makes my legs clap together

Am slightly worried now. Hope I'm not on the Wentworth train to Crazy Town too...eep!

And on that note, I'll sign off

Much love,
Miss Red x

bullshit debt advice

2006-09-18T13:01:00.000+01:00

its everywhere.

as i'm browsing it pops up:

"Advice on Debt Consolidation, Bankruptcy and IVA in the UK.
Our professional advice is FREE, our service is also FREE.
Within 24 hours, you could be on your way to debt freedom."

BLAH FUCKING BLAH!!!!!!!!!!!!

"REDUCE your Debt
Up to 80% of your debt written off
REDUCE your repayment period
In 60 months you will be debt free
REDUCE your monthly debt repayments
Only pay what you can afford
STOP interest & charges
Your debts will not increase
STOP creditors chasing you
No more letters or phone calls
STOP court actions against you
Peace of mind"

i believe you not you fuckers. you're the ones that got us into this shit in the first place.

mad at the money grabbing world,

miss black

What use is Victoria Newton to the human race?

2006-09-18T11:28:00.000+01:00

its a fair question www.holymoly.co.uk what use is Victoria Newton to the human race?

had to jump on board this debate! and highlight our fantastic london girls blog.

join us on our road to freedom, from debt (and the likes of viccy newton.)

we love to hate her too.

peace and love

miss black x

LIFE IS GOOD!!

2006-09-15T15:24:00.000+01:00

i'm buzzing today. full of life. energy. light. joy.
i'm a bit hungover, but really enjoying it!
i'm looking at everything through new eyes.
loving it. i was walking to yoga on my lunch break.
i could just see love everywhere.
smiley people
sunshine
light shining
laughter and happiness...
i think it was there all the time
i just wasn't always looking
i'm glad i looked.
i don't feel like i'll ever look back again
my glass is very much half full, in fact its full full!!
i hope miss red is having a nice time in france.
i feel like i could take the world on today.
good times ahead. all this and its payday! joy of joys!!

fucking hippy i know.

no particular reason

Day 16: Still in a good mood...

2006-09-14T16:22:00.000+01:00

...and still not smoking.

Has the world ended or is this just the new me?

I fucking hope not.

I'll find something to be miserable about soon I'm sure.

Had lunch with the delightful FFLH today (she of 'I was up until 2.30am watching Prison Break' fame). She won tickets to see the Scissor Sisters on Saturday but I can't go cos I'm in France...gah!

She therefore felt the need to compensate for this grave hardship with a care package in the form of Season 1 and episodes 1-4 of Season 2 of Prison Break on DVD (where she obtained these DVDs, we do not ask or care) and a signed photo of Wentworth Miller that she bought off eBay for £1! She also got us tickets to see the Killers at Brixton Academy in Nov.

We *heart* FFLH.

The signed photo is quite obviously fake and I nearly wet myself laughing when she gave it to me.

But comedy value aside, it's still a photo of Wenty with his top off so I may frame it and put it by my bed.

I'm off to France this weekend for a family holiday type thing (ahhhh...*that's* what's going to make me miserable again, knew something would come along!) so I'll see you lot on Wednesday.

Be good,

Miss Red x

Are we broke cos we like Kylie?

2006-09-14T15:27:00.000+01:00

According to this new University of Leicester study, there are links between your musical taste and lifestyle.

So your socioeconomic status relates to the music you enjoy listening to.

See, it's not our fault we're in debt! We should be listening to opera.

Fucking Kylie.

Greedy Bitch

2006-09-14T15:23:00.000+01:00

Just bought this muffin for £1.20 but have only eaten half of it.

What a waste!

*throws 60p out the window*

Miss Red x

Screw you Starbucks!

2006-09-14T14:59:00.000+01:00

Here at RITBN, we approve of anyone brave enough to go toe-to-toe with a big corporation but even we can't see the logic in this one:

A Starbucks customer in the US who was told her free drink voucher was worthless is launching a $114m lawsuit

The woman's lawyer says $114m equals the cost of drinks for all those turned away when the company decided to cancel its offer.

*scratches chin*

Now, does that mean if she wins, she's going to return the money to the people who didn't get a free coffee? Or is she just going to take the money and fuck off to the Caribbean?

Wethinks the latter...

Either way, we wish her luck and thank her for the excuse to post the rude pic Miss Red took in Barcelona.

Day 15: WTF?!

2006-09-13T15:42:00.001+01:00

I'm not entirely sure what's going on.

Miss B, despite a good start reminiscing about Bestival, is in a foul mood again and I feel *amazing*

I'm slightly scared that I've inadvertedly entered some sort of twilight zone where Miss B is a moody bitch and I'm a non-smoker and really happy about it.

*scared*

God knows why but I woke up this morning with a spring in my step and for the first time in 11 years, I feel like a non-smoker.

Thanks be to fuck.

It's weird though cos I still want to smoke but I'm deciding not to. It's like I'm in control for once and it feels v.liberating.

It's like I have my life back and I don't have to worry about not going to certain cafes or bars because I can't smoke or when I can next get away from my desk to have one.

Going away this weekend with my family and it would normally be a source of great stress: a flight, sharing a hotel room and going out, all without smoking. How long is the flight? Will my bro keep mum occupied while I sneak off to have a fag? Will I be standing outside the hotel in my PJs @ 1.30am having a quick one while everyone's asleep?

But I don't need to worry about that now. I can just have fun (well as much fun as you can have with your mum and brother!)

I'm gonna shut the fuck up now cos I'm starting to sound like Allen-fucking-Carr!

My obsession with this man however -->

isn't diminishing and I'd love to do things to him I'm sure are illegal.

Slightly worried that I've replaced one addiction with another!

Oh well...

Miss Red x

(When I break next week and start smoking 20-a-day again I'm *so* gonna regret this post!)

disco trainee!

2006-09-13T15:11:00.001+01:00

i randomly sat next to this today at work.

a sequinned glitter coat with a 'trainee' (spelt wrong) badge on it!

I HAVE NO IDEA????!!!!!!

random.

miss b x

Poor the Miss B!

2006-09-13T15:10:00.000+01:00

I do feel for her.

I think she's going through what I went through on Friday.

She's right. This is getting fucking boring now. I'm sick of worrying about money, it's all I seem to do and it's become such a big part of my life that I can't remember a time when I wasn't fretting about an unpaid bill or how I'm going to make it through until payday.

*dramatic sigh*

But what we need to remember is that this isn't going to happen over night. Yes, we're still in debt but the amount we owe is going to take *years* to pay back.

That sounds daunting I know (believe me, I know) but at least we're not accumulating more debt in the process of paying it back.

Besides, it's gonna take us a while to learn about this budgeting malarkey. We've never done it before so we need to walk before we run.

I guess, we have to keep reminding ourselves why we're doing this and try to stay on the straight and narrow.

Wish us luck!

Miss Red x

MUM is ME

2006-09-13T14:48:00.000+01:00

i realised something.

my mum told me that when she first married my dad they did all their finances and worked out waht they could spend on their salaries.

they decided to keep a spending diary.

much like this god forsaken treat you are reading.

my mum found the aforementioned spending diary last year.

page 1

she had detailed EVERY spend using rulers to seperate the weight of each potato and the price in d (or something)

page 2

she turned it into the diary tracking the growth of her new puppy.

I AM MY MUM.

im fucking sick of having to tell you what i spend/earn/whatever blah blah blah.

whos stupid idea was this anyway?

mine?

*takes self outside for a fight*

Miss Blacks Weekly Spend....

2006-09-13T14:41:00.000+01:00

im bored of doing this.
i wish i was rich.

monday 4th

£10 oyster top up
£4 lunch
£20 tescos shop

tuesday 5th

£10 lunch, bought my mate lunch cos i missed his bday
£10 present to mate, "
dinner with the in-laws, lovely folk paid :o)
£20 petrol, drive back

wednesday 6th

£8 sunbed (leave me alone i was pasty)
byo'ed my lunch
boyf made me yummy dinner

thursday 7th

yoga £9
£20 tesco, stock up on festival snacks

friday-monday (bestival)

somewhere in the region of £150-200

(beer/food/costumes/petrol/ice creams/tea/cake/breakfast etc etc etc etc)

yawn yawn

im overdrawn

had to steal money off flatmates to post something today.

bad person blah blah.

i wanna go shopping.

BORED NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Miss Red's Weekly Spend - w/beg Sept 4th

2006-09-13T12:19:00.000+01:00

Monday
£1 - tea
£1 - bagel
£6.95 - pub lunch (with Miss B! We talked about the blog - so does that count?)

-------------

Tuesday
£1 - tea
£1 - bagel

-------------

Wednesday
£1 - tea
£1 - bagel
£7.25 - pub lunch
£10.83 - Paperchase (leaving present, card, wrapping paper)
£20 - pub (leaving do)
£5.20 - cab home

-------------

Thursday
£1 - tea
£1 - bagel

-------------

Friday
£1 - tea
£1 - bagel
£5.20 - cab home
£15 - takeaway (went out and had 4 drinks but didn't pay for them so that's OK, isn't it?)

-------------

Saturday
£7.80 - Lunch with friend
£28 - Sainsburys
£5 - cab home

-------------

Sunday
Nothing

-------------

Total - £121.23 (oops)

Money saved not smoking - £35

teenage mutant hero miss black!

2006-09-13T11:40:00.000+01:00

Here I am with my 'gays' at Bestival dressed in the aforementioned turtle and superman costumes.

god bless the kids department in woolworths.

i nearly weed my pants i was laughing so much this weekend.

this is my cousin wearing a superman costume designed for 10-11 yr olds.

this is my fave pic of the festival.

we bumped into mini superman, who looked much cooler than we did!!

great pic!!

this was how my vision was by the end of the night. i turned my turtle suit into a boob tube, partly due to the heat and partly due to it being made for 4 yr olds and digging into my armpits, oww!!

so worth it though, we got so many people stopping and admiring our outfits!!

loved it!!

a happy miss b! xxx

(apart from a minor drama this morning involving buying boxes and queing in the post office, but i'm over it now!)

HAVE A LOVELY DAY!! :o)

xxxxx

A big thank you to Metro...

2006-09-13T10:53:00.000+01:00

...for ripping off our name in today's paper.

We should probably be flattered but we're gonna call you thieving bastards anyway. (Unless you give us a column, then all will be forgiven, natch)

Sharing the Love...

2006-09-12T17:51:00.000+01:00

Got a lovely email from someone this morning via our Myspace page and it made us smile so much, we had to share:

Subject: love it

Laydees This is bi-yoot-iful page...quite frankly, if there is a more "poignant to my life" myspazz profile out there, I know not of it. I am trying to sort out my money comsumption by keeping those lovely things that got me in this fine mess close to my heart...so I am starting a jewellery-making course next week. We'll see... Take care. [name withheld for privacy] xx

We sometimes forget that people are actually reading this and it means so much when someone gets in touch, especially when they're in a similar position.

So if you're lurking, and there's anything you want to say, don't be shy! We're lovely. Honest...

(Plus it strokes our insatiable egos, which is always a good thing!)

Day 14: COME ON!

2006-09-12T17:34:00.000+01:00

Day 14 ...oh yes!

14 days without a cigarette, I never thought I'd see the day!

I am goddess. A fragrant cigarette-free goddess. And I feel fan-fucking-tastic!

If you've been thinking of giving up, I strongly recommend it.

OK, so it's a bit shit at first (understatement of the year, granted and I would have ripped anyone's head off with my bare hands if they'd said that to me on Day 2 but with hindsight, it's true) but it's *totally* worth it!

I feel amazing. Invincible. Like I can do anything.

And I'd like to do --------------->

Oh yes!

Miss Red x

Day 10: I'm blue :(

2006-09-08T14:42:00.001+01:00

I'm not sure what's got into me, but I'm feeling v.low today*

For once, it's not the lack of nicotine that's bothering me, it's the lack of money.

My nicotine withdrawal has provided a distraction from my money worries but it seems that now I'm coming to terms with being an ex-smoker, the anxiety is back with a vengeance.

I knew this money rehab wouldn't be easy but I guess I'm beginning to feel a little hard done by.

I appear to be giving everything up (cigarettes, shopping, nights out, etc) and not seeing much in return. I have barely made a dent in my debt and I'm still living on one of my credit cards.

On the other hand, Miss B's still having fun.

After all, she's off at Bestival this weekend while I'm getting ready for the long dark weekend before payday...again! She's buying flowers for Freddie Mercury and cat cardigans while I'm stuck in the house watching the Sopranos.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not having a dig at Miss B at all. I love the bones of her and she deserves every bit of fun she has.

After all, she's in nowhere near as much debt as me, she got a bonus this year when I didn't (and even if I did get one, she still got twice as much as I normally get) and she rents and doesn't own like me, so doesn't have all the expenses that come along with being a homeowner.

So I shouldn't compare myself with her. Yes, we're both cash whores but our financial situations are completely different.

I guess I thought, going into this, that we would be in this together. We would both be on the breadline staying in every night, living on basic rations and there was some comfort in that...knowing that I wasn't alone. But it would appear that I am.

Maybe Miss B is a better example to you all than I...how to pay off your debts and still have a life. That has to be more encouraging than nicotine withdrawal and square eyes from watching too much TV.

*sigh*

Anyway, something's gotta give.

I've booked an appointment with the bank manager to see what can be done. I can't keep living like this.

As always, I'll keep you all posted.
Miss Red x

* Maybe I do know what's got into me, it's the impending 'visit'. Miss B and I appear to have synced up - God help you all!

Good Advice: Del Boy Trotter

2006-09-08T14:40:00.000+01:00

This time next year Rodney, we'll be millionaires!

Del Boy Trotter, Only Fools and Horses

Day 9: Who you callin' bitch?

2006-09-07T16:01:00.000+01:00

Ahhhhh...Miss B...

It's good to see that despite all that yoga, roller-skating and those 'I LOVE U' salads, when Aunt Flo comes to town, you're still just as curmudgeonly as the rest of us.

All you need is love?

Yeah right! All you need is Feminax more like...

As for me, I am feeling positively saint-like today. To reiterate: I AM A GOLDEN GOD! I AM A GOLDEN GOD! etc, etc (If you don't know where that quote's from, please fuck off from this blog. We don't want your kind reading this...)

Aside from not smoking for 9 days, I also managed to avoid the biggest temptation of all last night...a night in the pub with my mates.

And man was I tempted...

Nearly broke when someone I fancied lit up (cos obv, he would have wanted to shag me on the spot if I'd smoked. Smoking makes you more attractive as any fool knows...) But I didn't.

So essentially, I gave up sex in favour of remaining smoke-free.

I AM A GOLDEN GOD! I AM A GOLDEN GOD! etc, etc
Miss Red x

P.S. So I'm in a good mood and Miss B's in a bad mood? It's like the Twilight Zone! *scared*

way to break the world record for the biggest fancy dress party ever!

2006-09-07T12:33:00.000+01:00

so we're off to Bestival this weekend, a festival on the isle of wight.

myself, my flat mate, who we'll call Miss Beige (trying to chose a colour for her and some how it fits, not being rude, but she is definitley a beige) my 2 two gays (one of whom is my cousin), who we'll call Mr Pink and Mr Pink Cousin.

every year at Bestival they try to break the Guiness book of records world record for the biggest fancy dress party ever. this year is no exception. there was talk of it being 'circus' themed but then people with clown phobia (which is a proper phobia apparently) complained, then there was talk of it being pirates. we just didnt know, so i went to woolworths and bought the above pictured costumes for age 11 year olds.

this should be a fun weekend.

pictures will be posted.

have a fab weekend

miss black (still poorly, but looking forward to silly costumes, sunshine and music to make it all better!)

xxx

the joys of a delightful frog hot water bottle

2006-09-07T12:22:00.000+01:00

i've been off a day and the womans gone mad.
mad.
its the lack of smoke.

i've been poorly and the bitch doubts my authenticity.
if it were unreal, then why would i now own this delightful frog hot water bottle?!!

(man didnt have one, this was the only one he could find in london, apparantly.)

it helped.
a bit.
im still not good.
its a lady thing.
as a fellow lass miss red should be on my side through this.
particuarly given that she knows how stressed i was that i might not be getting the visit at all.
(3 tests and counting)
so phew.
and ow.
and thank god for frog shaped hot water bottles.

and i'm going to bestival on the isle of wight tomorrow. going to yoga at lunchtime in the hope that it will take all the pain away.

in other news, i got some lovely skinny black cords from h&m this week.

god im boring.

sorry.

thank you and good night

miss black xxx

Wentworth Miller: PUBLIC HEALTH WARNING

2006-09-06T16:51:00.000+01:00

I feel that it is my duty to warn all women (and susceptible men) out there about the hypnotic powers of Mr Wentworth Miller.

As you know, I myself have fallen for his seductive charms and openly admit that he is the only reason that I have given up smoking.

He has distracted me from my cravings with impure thoughts, which has been infinitely more useful than my nicotine patches (their sole purpose, it would seem, would be to be rolled up and smoked).

However, it would appear that I am not the only one...

Exhibit A: The First Church of Wentworth Miller. I. Have. No. Words.

Exhibit B: An honest to God email I received from my mate:

From: FFLH
Sent: 06 September 2006 10:06
To: Miss Red
Subject: obsessed

Ok that's it.

You know how obsessed you are with La Miller? Take it, quadruple it and multiply that by a million - stayed up till 2:30 watching Prison Break.

*sigh* he's so pretty.

I know I'm sad.
f

I shit you not. I told her about him on Tuesday. Again, I shit you not.

Exhibit C: Another honest to God email I just got from my BOSS:

From: Miss Red's Boss
Sent: 06 September 2006 17:20
To: Miss Red
Subject: RE: My future husband...

apparently he's *seeing* this woman here http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0005517/ she's still married. Hussy....

That's right kids. My boss. I told her about him this morning.

The man seems to send normal, well-balanced women, with lives and jobs and fabulous handbag collections, completely loopy.

Why?

As one of those women, I cannot tell you. I am 29 years old FFS with a fangirl crush akin to the one I had on Jordan Knight when I was 14.

I love him. I actually love him. It's scary.

I make no apology for this however. Judge me all you like. I just have two words for you: GET FUCKED.

So if you are considering watching Prison Break, think twice. This man will seriously effect your libido and ruin you for all other men.

Don't say I didn't warn you...
Miss Red x

(P.S. When we get married, I'm sure he'll find all of this v.endearing and not at all stalker like)

Day 8: COCKminster

2006-09-06T16:13:00.000+01:00

Day 8 and I'm still not smoking.

It's shit...I miss it...blah...blah...

It's surprising how unhelpful some people are being though.

Most are being v.supportive (translation: praising me constantly, which is my only motivation for doing anything) but some just say things like: "It's only been 8 days..." and "It gets *so* much harder from now on..."

Brilliant. Thanks for that. I am now so reassured I will never pick up another cigarette again.

Cunts.

If Miss B were here, she'd feed me some hippy crap about love and forgiveness and I'd feel marginally better. But calling them cunts on a blog is so much more satisfying.

Speaking of Miss B, she never made it into work today. Appara it's cos she has 'the visit' and is suffering and has absolutely *nothing* to do with the fact that she was out late with her fella last night. Nope. Not at all.

But who needs Miss B to brighten your mood when you have London vandals?

A big thank you to whoever made me laugh out loud on the Bakerloo line this morning.

I salute you!

Miss Red x

Day 7: IN YOUR FACE CANCER!

2006-09-05T17:10:00.000+01:00

I AM A GOLDEN GOD!

7 days smoke free. 7 fucking days.

Oh yes!

Happy Birthday Freddie!

2006-09-05T13:07:00.000+01:00

Money may not buy happiness, but it can damn well give it!

Good Advice: Free Eye Tests

2006-09-05T12:52:00.000+01:00

Boots are currently offering free eye tests, so if you need one, get booking! Miss Red's just booked one for Thursday lunchtime.

More info here: http://64.251.25.153/ (extended until Sept 15th due to popular demand).

Free stuff. It's the way forward.

fucking money

2006-09-05T10:57:00.000+01:00

i love miss red.
but shes been on my case to post my weekly spend for days.
its because i keep putting it off.
and coming in with new clothes.
and jewlerry.

i thought i'd distract her by posting lots of pretty pictures and stories.

it didnt work.

dam.

the sly dog.

here goes, please don't be too hard on me, i'm only human.

Monday -
£65 tesco (essential, food!)
£20 top up Oyster card

Tuesday -
Rode my bike - free!!
£5 lunch
£8 yoga class
£6 5 cans of red stripe beers
£5 cakes/snacks
(i've got friends staying, i can't elt them go hungry!)

Wednesday -
£15 breakfast
rode my bike in - free!
£35 tesco (food and booze)
£6 5 beers (late night decision to drink more - we were having fun, don't judge me)

Thursday -
£9 yoga
£5 lunch
£8 beers in the pub
£30 out for dinner with friends
£6 more beers
£250 council tax bill

Friday -
Rode in - free!
£45 Gym membership comes out of account today
£3 tea/snacks
£15 lunch from boots, and a few products, its friday let me off
ended up meeting boyfriend in pub:
£20 drinks/food
£20 taxi

Saturday -
£8 sunbed (with cream) let me off, the suns gone and im pasty
£25 in charity shops, vinyl, yarn, accessories
£5 lunch
£10 fruit and veg, good old walthamstow market, stocked up for a week on bargains!
£25 tesco, dinner and beers

Sunday -
£28 m&s breakfast (there were 5 of us, let me off)
£8 starbucks with my gay on the way to visit freddie mercurys house, what an adventure we had!!
£45 h&m, sorry, i just found some lovely bits, including a cardigan with cats on!
£18 urban outfitters, a lovely necklace with a heart on it!
(if i add an exclamation mark does it make it ok?!)
£10 oyster top up

total £753

sorry.

is all i can say.

ive let myself down more than anyone else.

please don't hate me.

miss black

pink i pod lesbians

2006-09-04T20:58:00.000+01:00

my ipod and miss red's ipods les it up.

this is why we are in so much debt.

not because our ipods are gay. but because we have expensive ipods.

a dog on a chair

2006-09-04T20:43:00.000+01:00

i want i want.

its a chair with a dog on it.

i saw it in a window in soho.

if im a good girl please can i have it.

i'll be so good.

miss black x

wakeboarding boyfriend

2006-09-04T20:35:00.000+01:00

went wakeboarding for my boyfriends birthday on the lake at thorpe park. theres my boy riding the wave.

i'd given up by then and was sitting whiplashed by the lake with my wet suit rolled down and what i hoped was 'boarder' style beach hair, but possibly looked like i'd been dragged through 42 suburban hedges.

i thoroughly recommend it tho.

and if you're into boarding, theres an amazing film coming out, that totally made me want to learn to board, check out the trailor at:

www.myoshka.tv

miss black x
(wakeboard chic)

how did i end up in a sex shop?

2006-09-04T20:03:00.000+01:00

i asked myself whilst in a sex shop.

i was walking down sex street in soho, as you do.
its not actually called sex street, but pretty much deserves the nickname.

i was en route to a circus themed drag night for one of my gays birthdays, wearing a leotard, a top hat, a suit jacket and carrying a whip, as you do. it was gone midnight.

suddenly it started PISSING it down.

i ran into what i thought was a record shop. why a record shop would be open at midnight i hadnt thought over. i went to appologise to what i assumed was the sales assistant, only to be faced with a semi naked girl holding a whip.

'christ, im in a strip club, talking to a stripper'

i was looking in a mirror.

a day in the life of miss black.

ps. had to take a pic of the place, look at the girls above the obscene sign, classy!!

pps. i shouldnt joke too much, if this projects fails i may be turning to my sisters for work.

Flowers for Freddie Mercury

2006-09-04T19:26:00.000+01:00

tuesday would have been Freddie Mercurys 60th birthday.

i took one of my gays on a daytrip to see the house where Freddie lived. We brought him some flowers and had a little moment. what a man.

we then ended up going shopping, we felt like Freddie would have approved. We've both read and adore his lovers autobiography, its such an incredible story and a crazy insight into the 80s gay scene. and the music scene at the time. i still can't believe he had to have a 'fake' wife. imagine will young having to do that now, itd be so obvious!! but then there are those tom cruise rumours, and when i say rumours, you've seen how connected i am on the london gay scene. in this instance rumour = truth.
but you didnt hear that here, we cant afford to be taken on by toms people!!
altho i often wonder how south park got away with the 'come out of the closet tom' episode!! love it!!

anyway, if you do anything this tuesday, have a moment for Freddie, an amazing man, and sing a little queen song to yourself, if you can't think of any, heres some classics:

Another One Bites The Dust
Killer Queen
Somebody To Love
Fat Bottomed Girls
Crazy Little Thing Called Love
Seven Seas Of Rhye
Don't Stop Me Now
I Want To Break Free

to freddie, a true legend!

miss black xxxx

Oxfam is your friend

2006-09-04T19:17:00.000+01:00

brilliant! large amounts of vinyl from the charity shop, at bargain prices, i'm so pleased!!
in exchange i had a HUGE clear out of my extensive wardrobe, and am giving these 2 bags to the charity shop, on top of 2 i gave last month. i'm going to see my old clothes walking around notting hill.
i feel cleansed though, like i can start a fresh!
a clean slate!! BRING IT ON!!!

Miss Black

Day 6: Thank God for Wentworth Miller...

2006-09-04T17:29:00.000+01:00

Purely gratuitous pic of the delectable Wentworth I know, but it is loosely related to what I'm about to say, I promise...

(Not that some of you will mind me posting a pic of 'The Pretty' as he is known in some circles of the interweb *scared*)

This weekend has been nothing short of hellish for no other reason than a lack of nicotine.

Fucking cancer.

I had foolishly thought that once I was past day 3, I would be OK, as so many people told me I would be. But alas no...

I assume the cravings that drove me to distraction and forced me to contemplate throwing myself under a bus were due to the fact that I wasn't at work.

Temptation was everywhere and I almost caved after the 13th newsagents I walked past. I was miserable and I knew that it would all go away if I just had a cigarette.

But I persevered, worked through it and satiated my cravings with impure thoughts of Mr Miller (see, told you there was a reason for the pic!) I swear to God, if I didn't have him to distract me, I would be smoking myself into a coma as I type.

In the end, I had to go home and hide. I drew the curtains in the living room and watched season 1 of Prison Break on DVD.

That may be the saddest thing I've ever admitted to and could constitute a cry for help but I don't give a shit.

I gotta do what I gotta do and you gotta do what you gotta do...

So I've made it to day 6 and I feel great...yay! God bless you Wentworth Miller!

Miss Red x

Miss Red's Weekly Spend - w/beg Aug 28th

2006-09-04T17:18:00.000+01:00

Monday - nothing

Tuesday - nothing

Wednesday - £1 tea - £1 caramel slice - £1 toasted bagel

Thursday - £1 tea - £1 toasted bagel

Friday - £1 tea - £1 caramel slice - £1 toasted bagel

Saturday - £28 shopping - £5 cab - £31.50 jacket - £20.83 nicotine patches

Sunday - nothing

TOTAL: £93.33

Money saved not smoking: £35

Miss B's Budget Fabulous - Sept 1st

2006-09-01T17:34:00.000+01:00

Today's Outfit

Jeans - £30 - Topshop
Boots - £35 - Absolute Vintage (Brick Lane, London)
Top - £20 - Topshop

Total: £85

That's Budget Fabulous baby!

Day 3 - Fuck eBay

2006-09-01T17:08:00.000+01:00

Oh God help me. Today has been *awful*

It would appear that everyone in the world apart from me, is smoking. Everyone I walk past in the street, stand next to at the station, sit next to in a cafe...everyone...

Even Wenthworth Miller (according to our new friend Lori - you can see her comment a couple of posts down). Damn, I knew that boy would be a bad influence *purs*

And the smell...it's potent...almost hypnotic. I've turned into some sort of cigarette bloodhound, smelling any fag within a 2 mile radius.

God I miss it. I *really* miss it.

But I will be strong. I shall resist. I shall overcome.

*shakes fist at nicotine*

eBay is being a fucking pain in the ass too. Some mong in Toronto bid (and won) my phone for £670!! Needless to say, she isn't replying to my emails. Fool.

*bangs head on desk*

I swear going on the game would be easier than this shit...

Miss Red x

Hungover with Freddie Ljungberg

2006-09-01T11:29:00.000+01:00

FREDDIE THANK YOU FOR HELPING ME GET OVER THIS HANGOVER FROM HELL.

so hungover. oh. ouch.

hurts to type.

dont worry i didnt spend anything. i had a lovely meal with my fabulous friends, we drank cocktails, they were disguised as yummy fuity milkshakes, then suddenly upon leaving i couldnt walk. i'm still having trouble today.

i still rode my bike in tho, a bit wobbley, but i made it. and im going to yoga at lunchtime, my teacher is used to me being hungover, i think he expects it now! hes great. i tried to set him up with my gay cousin, but he has a boyfriend, ah well.

anyway, we've decided to put incentive photos in, partly to be blogger whores as it seems people come across our site more often when there are pics, and partly cos we like pics of hot boys.

ps my boyfriend is hotter than him.
pps i am a happy girl.
ppps oh yes.

Good Advice: Prada v/s Primark

2006-08-31T16:57:00.000+01:00

From MSN Money:

According to Coco Chanel, “fashion fades - only style remains the same”. Now, almost a century after she began to transform the way women dress, her words have never been more relevant.

If you won a few million on the lottery tomorrow, you could shop to your heart's content in the finest designer stores. But no matter how much money you spend, there is no guarantee that you would have the required sense of style to carry it off.

What sets the likes of Kate Moss and Carrie Bradshaw apart is their innate sense of style. They show over and over again that a few pounds spent on a vintage item can be every bit as good an investment as several thousand spent on designer kit.

Less is more
Buying a dress or suit which costs the equivalent of the deposit on a property could be an investment if it is a beautifully-made, classic piece which will last a lifetime. Grabbing the latest look in the hope that everyone will know what the label says and how much you paid for it just makes you a fashion victim. It's not the 80s any more.

At London Fashion Week you can guarantee that just about every editor, writer and buyer will wear at least one piece from Topshop. It may be alongside their discounted designer garb and their vintage gems but high street is as essential as high end. Ask any plane-load of tourists from New York about their first UK shopping destination and you'll hear Topshop - and even Primark – every time.

Now that Primark is featuring staples such as pure cashmere jumpers for just £30, there really is no need to blow your budget.

The devil may wear Prada but such is Primark's meteoric rise that fashionistas have given the store the tongue-in-cheek nicknames Pradamark and Pri-Marni. Vogue has featured its pieces and footballer Wayne Rooney's girlfriend Coleen McLoughlin has been spotted toting Primark bags. Remember, it's not what it costs, it's how you wear it that counts.

http://money.uk.msn.com/mymoney/womenandmoney/article.aspx?cp-documentid=848514

Day 2: Not killed anyone...yet...

2006-08-31T16:05:00.000+01:00

Feeling surprisingly calm today. Managed to get some sleep last night so feel more human. The cravings are still there but are proving less of a distraction today. My head's still killing me though.

I'll be honest, I thought I would have caved by now so I'm v.proud of myself. That doesn't mean I won't but I keep telling myself that if I can get through the first 72 hours, I'll be OK. Apparently they're the hardest and as I'm about 11mins short of hitting the 48 hour mark, knowing that I'm half way there is rather reassuring. (Impure thoughts of Wenthworth Miller are also helping immensely! On my first anniversary of giving up, I shall write him a letter thanking him for the support).

*SCREAM*

Just went into my desk drawer to look for some headache pills and found my emergency pack of cigarettes!

*runs for the hills*

Miss Red x

Good Advice: Oscar Wilde

2006-08-30T16:12:00.001+01:00

Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.

Miss B's Budget Fabulous - Aug 30th

2006-08-30T14:56:00.000+01:00

Todays Outfit

Skull and Crossbone Necklace - £4 - Claires Accessories

Green Cardigan - £15 (haggled from £25 Camden Market)

Grey vest - £3 - H&M

Denim Shorts - £30 Karen Millen (sale - £60 full price)

Pink sparkley socks - £6 for 3 pairs - Topshop

Green sandals - £6 - Primark

TOTAL: £66

Thats budget fabulous baby!!

Day 1: My Nicotine Hell

2006-08-30T14:53:00.000+01:00

Oh God save me. Following a delightful weekend with Miss B, spending v.little money and feeling v.virtuous, I am now in hell.

For reasons I can no longer remember, I vowed to give up smoking last night and at exactly 5pm I had my last taste of that sweet, sweet nicotine.

For anyone that knows me, this is no mean feat. I'm not ashamed to admit (although I probably should be) that I *love* smoking. It's the only thing I'm good at and I'm not one of these people who constantly moans about wanting to give up. I actually *enjoy* smoking, and not because it makes me look cool and smell *grate*, but because it makes me happy.

Sad but true.

But at £5+ a packet, I can't sort out my finances as long as I carry on. The fact of the matter is, I can't afford to smoke. I know I shouldn't smoke because it's bad for me...blah...blah...but the real reason is the money. After all, if the health risk played any part in my thought process, I wouldn't light a cigarette in the first place would I?

So here I am, all patched up and anxiously gnawing my way through a pack of gum. I knew it would be hard but fuck me! Didn't sleep a wink last night, I'm irritable, my head is killing me and my sides ache.

This is hell. I hope it gets better. It has to.

Emailed my friends earlier warning them that I've given up and I fear I may murder someone so one of them will probably need to supply alibi. I wish I was joking.

On a brighter note, Prison Break and most notably Wentworth Miller, are proving to be a rather delicious distraction.

If I never smoke again can I have him please? Now that would be an incentive to give up...

Miss Red x

Haircuts for vodka, has it come to this?

2006-08-30T11:50:00.000+01:00

I've been trying to be good, but i havent really. Its so hard, its not fair, its boring. i like spending money. i like having nice things around me, i like eating well, i like to be able to offer to pick up bills, treat people, i don't like doing this.

But i'm trying to be positive, Miss R and me are in this together, which helps, i know its shit for her too.

one small, but very important example (as a female who cares for her hair) i need a bloody hair cut and some expensive products. I've had it with economy shampoo and split ends. So i used my budget/journalistic thinking and asked my lovely neighbour, who is a hair dresser. I got a free trim, the lovely lady, in exchange for a vodka and coke, love it!

Then i went to Boots, she told me to, shes a hairdresser. She said my ends needed it, it wasnt my choice. But then i saw the wonder that is the ORANGE STICKER SHELF. *drools* Normal products, at cut price prices. I nearly did a wee with excitment, grabbed everything i could see, and now i'm happy again, and proud of my savings and my haircut for vodka story.

Then, as you can see in the picture, i got caught in the very vicious circle that got me in this mess in the first place, the voucher. 'Congratulations customer, having been tricked into spending an obscene amount of money with us, here is a voucher, offering you a small amountof money off, if you only spend another obscene amount of money with us', I know their game, but i'm hooked, i'm sucked in, the voucher screams at me from my purse, 'use me, use me!'

The reality is i paid a £250 council tax bill yesterday and i might not be able to afford to eat by next week. Must hide voucher, or even worse, throw voucher away. If i'm feeling brave I might put it in the shredder later. Note, 'might'...

Not having such a great time with this,

Miss Black

Primark we salute you!

2006-08-29T17:30:00.000+01:00

this weekend myself and miss red deciced we would try and have a lovely day out and night in without spending our normal 'sex and the city' style lifestyle prices. heres how we got on!!

a trip to "wilkos" meant aoviding the normal over spend in boots. miss r still got her dove, but 48p what a bargain!! and look at my bag full of treats, what normally would have cost at least £90 set me back £15!! miss red got a new phone, it was a FREE upgrade! so the first part of our shopping trip was FREE YIPPEE!!! and we still felt like we were spending! and she got put on a better tarriff so she spends less, ive just done the same thing, its amazing how you can just be chucking £50-£100 more at your phone company when you could be on £30 bills if you were only on the correct tarriff. so we got something new and learned how to save money on phones! double tick.

a trip to primark meant avoiding the normal remortaging after hitting the high street and we both still came away happy!! look at my fabulous shoes!! joy!!!

knitting with an american bulldog as foot rest!

2006-08-29T17:26:00.000+01:00

today i am knitting with my doggie at my feet, its free its fun and i love it!!

miss black x

Not much to say really...

2006-08-25T17:53:00.000+01:00

...apart from 'hello' and have a lovely bank holiday weekend. I know I will and hopefully it won't cost loads of money! *fingers crossed*

I also wanted to say a HUGE thanks to everyone that has been leaving their comments. We're not sure how you found us seeing as we haven't told anyone about this blog, but we're very glad that you have and we hope that we will see you again soon.

Much love,

Miss Red x

P.S. Gave 50p to someone collecting for the Samaritans this morning cos I figured, I don't need them cos I have Miss B. I thought I could help them help people who aren't as lucky as me. DID YOU HEAR THAT KARMA?!!

NEW: The RITNB eBay Shop!

2006-08-25T17:02:00.000+01:00

Roll up! Roll up!

At last, the Red is the New Black Shop is open for business:

http://stores.ebay.co.uk/RITNB

Go and have a look at some of the fabulous things on offer and if you see anything you like, get bidding!

Thanks for your support,

Miss Black and Miss Red x

a GAY night, always the death of me

2006-08-25T15:13:00.000+01:00

ooh its been a while!

sorry folks im crap. in the monetry department too.

in the last few days alone i have:

spent over £60 on props for a circus themed drag costume night
spent over £150 on beers/meals and taxis
lost my £350 glasses on the dancefloor in G.A.Y

oh dear.

tonight is the aforementioned circus themed drag night in Too2Much a drag club in soho, its my cousins birthday. taxis/drinks/door fee to come, boo. but ive been having such fun. maybe being in debt is worth it for the fun?!!

pull yourself together woman. myself and miss red are going to have an experiemental budgeting weekend where we try and do stuff we'd normally do, but for less money, good god.

tune in next week to see how we get on.

miss black (i wish) xx

Good Advice: Carrie Bradshaw

2006-08-24T14:48:00.000+01:00

If I don't stop shopping, I'll end up a bag lady; a Fendi bag lady, but a bag lady...

(Ring a Ding Ding, Sex and the City Season 4)

Come on Karma! Throw me a bone…

2006-08-23T17:53:00.000+01:00

Ugh. What a day. What a shitty fucking day.

First of all, I dropped my hair dryer this morning and broke it!

*SCREAM*

(Unless you're currently sporting a poker straight bob like me, this will mean nothing to you but it's right up there with my mother dying.)

Convinced that it was the end of the world, I slopped into work (with frizzy hair, natch) but quickly cheered up when I heard that someone I fancy v.v.v.much is coming in tomorrow (sorry, can't say who, what or where cos they're famous and it's more than my job's worth, innit).

There is a God after all.

Swept away with excitement of meeting my future husband, I went a bit mental and bought a top (he's a millionaire and of course would pay off all my debts when we get married so it's OK, right? No? Oh...)

Yes I know, I don't have money for new clothes especially new clothes to impress a famous person I *might* accidentally-on-purpose bump into when I'm outside having a cigarette. I think this is the very definition of 'mental'.

I knew it was wrong and I knew I couldn't afford it, but I did it anyway (taking full advantage of the fact that Miss B is on a course today and couldn't stop me). Gah!

Of course I could justify it by saying that the top was in the sale for £15 and I got it instead of the £28 one I actually wanted and I didn't get the black sequined shoes from Schuh or the skull and crossbones brooch I fell in love with from Dorothy Perkins, but I won't.

So Karma dictates that when you doing something that fucking stupid, you will be punished. And punished I was; my future husband cancelled. Turns out he isn't even in the country.

First my bonus…then my hairdryer…now this…it's not fair!

*ties hair back*
*strokes new top*
*checks bank balance*
*cries*
*bangs head on desk*

OK Karma, I'll make you a deal. If I promise to be a v.good girl and not frivolously spend money on things I don't need, will you stop kicking my ass? And if I'm a v.v.v.v.good girl, will you reward me with this:

I'll never spend another penny again as long as I live if you do. Cross my heart…

Miss Red x

P.S. for the record, Jason Lee isn't my aforementioned future husband, I'm still not telling. Although he could be, with Karma's help obv! ;)

Remember me?

2006-08-17T13:26:00.000+01:00

Haven't blogged for a while, which is v.naughty, I know.

TBH, things haven't been great and unlike Miss B, I haven't quite grasped the benefits of using this blog to purge myself of things that are bothering me. Instead, I shut down and bottle it up in the vain hope that it will go away eventually. But it never does.

So here I am. Poised to unload on you lot, whoever you are, I hope you're prepared! (Feel free to hit the 'back' button. I won't be offended, I promise…)

As always, my despondency stems from a lack of money. It's time for our annual bonus at work and as always, I was spending it before I had it. It's never much, only a couple of hundred quid after tax but it's still a couple of hundred quid I don't have. And with my 30th birthday coming up at the end of the year, I was planning to save it to pay for that because I want it to be special, and I know I'll have no money to celebrate it properly (without going further into debt obv).

So of course I didn't get a bonus this year, for reasons I'm still unclear about despite several 'heated' meetings with my boss, which will ensure that I never get a bonus again.

I had naively thought that someone, somewhere would give me a break. After all, I've owned up to my issues, 'come out' to my family and I'm trying to change my ways. That must count for something, Shirley?

It counts for shit apparently.

A word to the wise kids, *never* get trapped in a job that you hate but can't leave because you have too many debts to pay. It's not a nice position to be in. Reason #147 not to get into debt.

Fuck em. I WILL do something *fabulous* for my 30th, with or without my crumby bonus, you mark my words! Watch this space!

This will also be mine:

Chocolate eye shadow…make up that looks like food…it's the way forward kids! *drools*

Miss Red x

Miss B's Budget Fabulous - Aug 17th

2006-08-17T13:19:00.000+01:00

Today's Outfit

Stripy vest - £2.99 - h&m
Polka dot backless top - £3 - Primark
Denim skirt - free (Miss B used to work for diesel)
Black polka dot leggings - £10 - Topshop
Black birkenstocks - £25 - Duty Free from the airport

TOTAL: £40.99

That's budget fabulous baby!

yes it's payday, but i'm NOT rich!

2006-08-15T16:00:00.000+01:00

I've had a complete change of mindset since doing this.

there was once a time that, come payday, i would forget that i had been eating mouldy bread the day before, and suddenly on that magical day, i was rich! i could step into topshop and buy whatever i liked, sale or non! i could mosy into marks and spencer for my weekly shop, and pick up a huge bunch of flowers from the market.

today i have been paid, "yay money!!" the old me would scream.....but, i still owe £10k and have rent and bills to pay, that hasnt disappeared.

now i know this is real, because this is the first payday of my LIFE that i have been aware of this....i honestly didnt know the worth of money before now. its like i've had a spiritual enlightenment. instead of the meaning of life, i have learned the meaning of money. (and possibly through this the meaning of life!)

today there was someones leaving meal at work, the person had left before i worked in this office, so i didnt actually know them...approaching lunchtime various people dropped out and this poor girl turned up and there was 1 person joining her to 'celebrate'. the old me would have dropped my plans and gone along, out of pity for the girl, and ended up spending £15 at least. i used to feel terribly obliged to go to things like this. but i've learnt that you just have to do your thing. there is always a leaving/birthday/welcome/engagement/dogs wedding anniversary party to go to, sometimes you just have to stand tall and rework your priorities. it was like sliding doors, i saw the old me leaving, having a plastic pub lunch with people i dont like, spending too much, wasting a whole lunch break of time i could have had for me, and being peed off with myself for not being stronger. but i didnt! i chose me!

this has not just been a change of money mindset, but of lifestyle. i want to use my time as effectively as i am my money. i dont want to waste money, so why should i waste time?

this is all true, except of dogs wedding anniversarys, they are always a hoot.

miss black x

spend a penny? i spent a few, oops.

2006-08-14T14:15:00.000+01:00

i knew weekends would be the death of me.

on friday i left work to meet some friends in the pub, i bought the first round, then hoped i'd be 'covered' for a few. (£16) we then decided to get some food, which worked out at something like £6 each, but i stupidly volunteered to put it on my card, then take the cash, but most people only have fivers, so i lost out there.
we then went on into soho, so i took out £20, more drinks. it was then decided that a cab home made more sense, £7 each, then drunken visit to the chip shop resulted in another £5 being spent.
great start budget girl.

saturday was 'meet the parents' day at my dads, apart from paying my boy £30 petrol money to get down to canterbury it was a free day. freak rain meant we didnt go for a walk by the sea, but a trip to a tacky bowling alley, it was quite fun actually! the dad paid, and for lunch, gotta love parents. i drove home late saturday, my mans taken the brave step of insuring me on his prize 'truck', yikes! pressure!

on sunday we'd arranged to meet one of my really old school friends and her girlfriend, we had a picnic in kensington palace gardens. my contribution to the picnic was an amalgamation of treats i found in my cupboards: tuna/pasta/sweetcorn/mayo, strawberries, sprite and chocolate brownies....my cupboards held me up well! normally i would have gone to m&s and spent £25 on quiche, sausage rolls, cupcakes, tradtional lemondae, wine and grapes. i'm very proud of my budgeting on that one!

today i bought my lunch with my 'buy 5 meals get the 6th free' card from boots, very exciting! generally i'm doing well, its just easy to slip into my old ways. i suppose with time it'll settle and the 'norm' will be to think before spending. i'm definatley over shopping though, the thought of it makes me feel sick. and i never thought i'd say those words.

we got quite a few comments over the weekend on the blog, all really positive, so thanks lots to you for following our journey. i really hope that we're providing an inspiration on top of a good story. if we can help others get out of the death debt trap then our spending sins have not been in vain!

cheers loads for checking in,

Miss Black x

Smell the stilton?

2006-08-11T17:05:00.000+01:00

So i'm too broke to buy lunch, so i've been making little salads every day. last night i stayed at my lovely boyfriends, and he very kindly made me lunch, knowing my current budget.

i nearly did a little cry when i opened the tuppaware to this message, spelt out in cheese and carrots!!

i have the cutest and the geekiest boyfriend rolled into one!! isnt that the best surprise a girl can find?!! and its free!

peace, love and cheese,

have a lovely weekend,

miss b x

The long weekend before pay day...

2006-08-11T16:40:00.000+01:00

It's Friday, I get paid on Tuesday and I currently have this much in my purse:

£3.40. Not much to say other than that really.

(Feel free to comment on the fabulous hot pink leather Fiorelli wallet though. The fact that my wallet is worth more than the money that's in it says a lot. Story of my life!)

Doesn't look like I'll be doing much this weekend, which fills my heart with joy, as you can imagine. Thank God for Big Brother! (Jesus, I died a little inside just typing that!)

Like Miss B, I'm missing a lot of things from my 'old' life, but it's getting easier.

Yes, I still drool every time I walk past the handbag window in the Oasis on Regent Street, but the urge to lick the window is diminishing with each passing day.

Yes, I still dream about shopping sprees in Topshop but as long as I'm just dreaming about it and not actually doing it, I guess it can't cause much harm.

The one thing I am *really* missing though is nice food. It was fun at first, kinda like camping. But now elbowing the old ladies out of the way at the reduced section in Somerfield is getting boring.

But it's all good. I know I can do it. And it's totally worth it. It's a means to an end, right?

So farewell M&S Food chilli prawn bucatini, hello homemade spag bol!

Farewell Waitrose mousaka, hello lasagne!

Farewell Duchy Originals Sunflower Seed and Honey bread, hello Kingsmill!

Farewell Salami Milano, hello Somerfield Makes Sense ham!

It was fun (and tasty) while it lasted...

*sigh*

Miss Red x

Miss B's Budget Fabulous - Aug 11th

2006-08-11T16:23:00.000+01:00

Today's Outfit

Dress - free (Miss B used to work in diesel)
Leggings - £10 - Topshop
Birkenstocks - £30

Belt - £30 (haggled from £40) - Spitalfields Market
Necklace - £3 - Urban Outfitters (sale)
Rings and bracelets - free - pressies

TOTAL: £73

That's budget fabulous baby!

just don't shop or eat any crips near me please

2006-08-11T10:48:00.000+01:00

i'm a failure. everything costs money.

this week i have tried so hard, but i have spent:

monday -
£23 supermarket
£15 oyster top up

tuesday -
£5 lunch
£20 supermarket

wednesday -
£14 train ticket to brighton
£5 lunch
£9 beers

thursday -
£15 oyster top up
£8 yoga class
£5 entry fee to a gig
£8 beers
£20 taxi home (baaad)

and tonight i'm going out for a big night out, spending is unvavoidable. saturday its 'meet the parents' for my poor boyfriend, (at least i wont be spending) and then sunday i'm meeting friends for a picnic (and food aint free)

does it have to cost just to live? i went to a gig last night on brick lane, loads of mates were there, i dont want to miss these things, but it costs man, my poor wallet.

arrive. '£5 entry please'
bar. '£3.30 a pint of shady please' (x 4)
late night bar. '£4 a red stripe please' '£4 a salad bagette' (i hadnt eaten so i had to with 5 beers in me!) another red stripe in and its...
taxi. '£20 please'
boyfriend: 'to walthamstow?'
cabbie: '£20'
boyfriend: *grumbles about the cost of living*
me: 'i'll pay' *cringes inside*

so not a good week so far. i do feel a general shift in my attitudes towards spending though. i used to not be able to walk past a shop without a look inside, to see what i was missing. the reality is its the same old crap every season. if you've got lovely basics and a few key seasonal pieces you really dont need to spend out, its totally the way you wear it anyway.

i knew this all along, but the old me wouldnt be able to walk past the all saints sale and not check there wasnt a bargain i was missing, stopping to buy something if i felt it would be a 'faithful life investment'. i've actually used that line reguarly to convince myself of a purchase. scarey!

weirdly, the very idea of shopping makes me feel a bit sick now. like sometimes, if i hear someone eating crisps really loudly on the train and i look up and they're there, with greasy crisps all round their mouth, making horrible crunching, breathing, chomping noises, it makes me never want to east crisps (or in extreme cases, anything) again. its the same with shopping, i'm seeing the shops in a completely different light. for what they really are, money grabbing, debt collecting, over priced, fake, mean mean temptresses. but thats the joy i have discovered, its not tempting anymore.

on a normal week i would at the very least have been in 10-20 clothes/shoes and accessories shops around central london, and at the very least have bought a pair of shoes or trainers, earrings/necklace/bracelet (sometimes all 3) and at least 3 items of clothing.....at least.

i'm a new woman, so i can applaud myself for this at least. i've definatley had a shift of mindset, i am looking interally at what im after, rather than externally at what short term kicks i can get from topshop. i have a wardrobe full of beautiful beautiful bits, i'm quite enjoying rediscovering whats in it!

so i suppose i shouldnt beat myself up too much about the spending, i do have to live afterall. i'm a darn sight better than i used to be, so if this is a gradual process then i'm definatley on an upward spiral. things can only get better. i'm taking on more work this term too, which means less spending (due to no time!) and more money, to save and pay off debts, perfect! this winter i also want to hibernate and rethink where i'm going and what it is i actually want to be doing. sometimes you can find yourself in a bit of a rut, a job you're quite good at, but you're not sure how you ended up in. i dont want to land in a comfortable rut and wake up in 20 years with wrinkles and not know where my youth went.

so heres to change. change, and a bargainous weekend. wish me luck with the 'meet the parents', he better wear a long sleeved top, i think we'll save his tattoos til their second meeting.

peace and purity to you blog fans,

Miss Black x

Gillian McKeith told me not to...

2006-08-09T15:14:00.000+01:00

Faced my second big test since our money rehab began this morning...a trip to Boots!

*gulp*

Unless you're cash whores like us, this will mean nothing to you. All I can compare it to is Imelda Marcos trying to walk past Office.

The scene of so many spending crimes, I can honestly say that I've *never* been to Boots without spending at least £25. So this was a real test for me, kinda like Pete Doherty refusing free brown.

Decided to have a quick cigarette beforehand to steady my nerves but lurking outside a shop on Regents Street, next to the bloke who sells the Big Issue, is never a good look.

So in I went, determined to only buy the deodorant and body spray I needed. It didn't take long for the cold sweats to start but luckily I know this Boots like the back of my hand so I could be in and out with no undue temptation. Like a ninja. A very fragrant ninja.

Deodorant in hand, I moved to the 'smellies' aisle but the cheeky bastards moved it! I had inadvertedly found myself in the most deadly aisle of all...the hair products! 3 for 2 on Trevor Sorbie...small but perfectly formed Charles Worthington hairsprays that are perfect for your handbag but only last two sprays and cost almost as much as the full size...

I actually began to drool.

Stopping mid aisle, I looked at the shelves surrounding me and at the beautiful bottles containing the sweet elixir of health(y hair). The cure for not only my split ends but also for everything else in my life (beautiful hair gets you promoted and a gorgeous boyfriend, as any fool knows).

Just as I was about to reach for a tub of Pantene Pro-V intensive anti-breakage treatment ("it's only £3.99, you can't put a price on your future happiness...") from nowhere, a voice inside me told me to put it down. I don't know who the voice belonged to, as I have so many of them in my head (they usually tell me to buy things I can't afford and shag blokes who will break my heart), but I imagine the voice to belong to Gillian McKeith. After all, the woman can make complete strangers shit in tuppaware containers, I wouldn't be surprised if she could stop me buying some intensive conditioner.

So, scared stiff and screaming inside, I literally ran away and found myself in the equally deadly 'smellies' aisle. Successfully avoiding the Sanctuary Mande Scrub, I grabbed my body spray and ran to the checkout, heart racing and panting (probably from the running - I don't tend to run).

The girl behind the counter eyed my flushed cheeks and furrowed brow suspiciously, trying to decipher whether or not I was a shoplifter as she bagged up my items.

"Do you know this deodorant is buy 2 get one free?" she said, a twinkle in her eye, obviously sensing my weakness.

"No thanks." I said feebly, handing her the money, hands shaking.

"Are you sure?" she persisted. "Buy 2 get one free..."

It was then that it dawned on me that she was the dealer and Dove deodorant was my drug.

Snatching my bag, I thanked her and got the hell out of there as quickly as I could. Maybe I am a cash whore but having 3 for 2's waved under my nose like that just isn't fair.

I knew it, Boots are no better than a bunch of fucking drug dealers.

Cunts.

Miss Red x

Miss B's Budget Fabulous - Aug 9th

2006-08-09T15:02:00.000+01:00

Today's Outfit

Dress - borrowed off flatmate
Blue leather clinch waist belt - 50p - Charity shop
Little cardie - £15 - h&m
Black leggings with polka dots - £10 - Topshop
Black bra - £3 - The Gap (sale)
Birkenstocks - £25 - airport

TOTAL: £53.50

That's budget fabulous baby!

a former designer whore turns all hippy on us

2006-08-09T12:35:00.000+01:00

ooh i did ever so well! you'll be so proud miss r!

i went to the big chill festival in the beautiful eastnor hills, ooh we do live in an incredible country. i was waitressing in the days, making £8 (+ tips on top), had my evenings free, fed and watered, all good! and boy did i make the most of it. everyday we had themed costumes, sailor girls, roller girls, bunny girls, boho hippy fesival chicks, ooh we looked fabulous! you think my day-to-day outfits are budget fabulous! well i did claire (off of claires accesories) so proud!

there was a lovely atmosphere, it was definatley the most civilized festival i've been too. there was a guardian/observer tent, for those of us that can't go without world news, fashion news, or being seen with a guardian. organic, soya, tofu, vegetarian, vegan, this fruit wanted to be eaten just by you type tents. there were recycling areas everywhere, even for tea bags. the clientele were 30 something smug marrieds with designer prams to match their "festival" outfits. their partners with designer tribal tattoos and shades, little bit beckham, but more jamie oliver in their values.

dont get me wrong, i'm not offended by middle class comfortable living, for goodness sake, its my demographic too. i looked around and everyone looked like me, white, well dressed, creative, smiling, chatty, well spoken, polite, comfortable, educated, small tattoo, birkenstocks, not too much flesh revealed, little bit rebellious, but we still would make our grannies proud types ; oh god i am cloned without even realising it.

its like when goths try to be "different", but you walk through camden, and aint no one look "different" there. to me, i look so different to anyone i went to school with, man, im the one that got away...but suddenly this weekend, i was one and the same. ive found my people, i dont know if its good or bad....i like breaking molds. hopefully i stood alone in my own unique way though, as i hope did all of the other clones, yikes!

anyway, that was my social festival analysis, the music was great too... i saw jose gonzalez, (which sounded just like the cd, i dont know if thats good or bad?) fink, from ninjatune, he was wicked, although he puts himself down when he says his songs are just about 'a night coming home from fabric', they're so much deeper than that, know your worth boy! i saw a bit of tunng, it was beautiful, they were playing 'woodcat' as i walked towards the stage, its my song of the summer, 'we all had a lovely time', and we really did. then they played 'jenny', for his sister jenny who was working there, and it made me think of my little brother and that if he wrote me a song it might be a bit like that one, so i did a little happy cry underneath my huge oversized sunnies!

all of this magic and i got paid to be there, i am living proof that you can budget and still have a brilliant weekend. above anything, im beginning to learn that this is a way of life, a mind set....its simple really....do you chose to be in control of your destiny? only you can make that choice.

i'm so happy to be doing this, its a journey of looking inside for things that are missing, instead of the usual 'shoppings the answer'. i dont need to spend a penny to be happy (well, i wouldnt want my bladder to burst, wa-wa-wa-wa....) but i really dont, i feel like i knew this all along.

i did love my designer clothes. ive got a wardrobe full of beautiful things. anything i dont wear anymore im going to sell on ebay, and anything i truely love im going to make sure i wear. theres stuff still with labels on that im so embarassed to have bought. this is truely a journey of self realisation. i am finding out so much about myself.

i recommend it, look in your purse, look at your bank balance, look in your fridge, wardrobe...are you living above your means? yes? only you can make the change girlfriend! do it! its easy, its fun and you dont know whats going to happen along the way. i've never felt so rich, honestly.
(cue 'fucking hippy' comments.)

peace out my friends, its time to get active, im on a wardrobe purge, and if any of ya fancy some beautiful accessories, get to our ebay shop over the next few weeks, there'll be some fabulous finds, and plus you'll be helping the cause, everyones a winner!

miss black

Miss B's Budget Fabulous - Aug 8th

2006-08-08T16:31:00.000+01:00

Today's Outfit:

Cropped jacket - £15 - h&m
Check top - Miss Sixty - £12 (in the sale)
Jeans - Topshop - £30
Turquoise belt - Camden market - £10 (haggled from £15)
Birkenstocks - £25 (cheaper at the airport!)
Bracelet - present from her Dad
Coral nail varnish - £2 - Collection 2000

TOTAL: £94

That's budget fabulous baby!

My kingdom for an M&S Party Bake...

2006-08-04T13:28:00.000+01:00

This week has been proper rubbish for Miss B and I.

I don't know whether it's our initial enthusiasm beginning to wane or the reality of what we have done and what we need to do setting in, but neither of us are feeling v.positive at the moment. Not to mention the fact that this budgeting malarkey is boring as fuck. All Miss B wants to do is buy clothes and all I want to do is sit indoors and eat an entire M&S Party Bake (but I can't afford one!) and we're only in week 2!

I'm hoping this is just fleeting and that Miss B will come back from the Big Chill more...er...chilled and that I will survive the weekend in tact.

I say that because I finally bit the proverbial bullet and told my Mum about my 'problem'. Her reaction was as much to be expected (I'm not angry, I'm just disappointed) and totally justified. She's coming over with my brother tomorrow and we're going to sit down as a family and discuss it. I'm not entirely sure what that will entail as we've never done that before, I just hope it won't involve an actual bullet.

I'll tell you all about it on Monday, if I'm still in one piece...

Have a fabulous weekend!
Miss Red x

Miss Red's Weekly Spend

2006-08-04T13:16:00.000+01:00

Friday
£3.48 - milk and something for dinner from Somerfield
£56 - mobile phone bill
£45 - electric bill

Saturday
£41 - shopping from Sainsburys (for 2 weeks)
£5 - cab home from Sainsburys (too much to carry on bus!)

Sunday
Nothing!

Monday
£1 - tea from Pret
37p - crisps
45p - chocolate

Tuesday
£1.35 - small salad (to go with sandwich from home)

Wednesday
37p - crisps

Thursday
60p - tea from local cafe
£1 - yarn (plastic bag full from my local charity shop - more about this later)

Friday (so far)
£1 - cup of tea @ station

Total weekly spend: £156.62 (oops!)

Stripy Paul Smith tent, small Mulberry wallet

2006-08-03T16:20:00.000+01:00

i'm all packed and ready to go to The Big Chill festival, got my outfits all planned, now fingers crossed for no rain. and fear not my budget loving friends, i am working this weekend, so it was a free ticket, im fed and watered whilst there too. just gotta pay my travel.

just been at yoga, went to get £10 out, card refused, i havent even got £10, its 13 days til payday. brilliant. nice planning. i am stupid and dumb and i deserve all the crap that is thrown at me after years of overspending and bad money planning.

joy of all joys my dear dear friend (whom we shall call Miss Pink as she is our money idol) has offered to lend me £100 to tide me over, and i do have £40 coming my way at some point which i lent my cousin, i know hes too broke to pay it back though. oh the joys of being a grown up, who would have guessed it would be so hard?

maybe i should sell out and work for a company I have no interest in but that pays well....i didn't think i'd get to 25 and be in this position. it sucks.

at least im going to a fun festival! line up is fab, im excited about:
Tunng, Vashti Bunyan, Jose Gonzales, Nizlopi, Jamie Lidell, Adem, Fink, Martha Wainwright, Amadou & Mariam and Nouvelle Vague.

Hopefully I won't be hard at work the whole time, bring on the fun in the sun, live music, long nights, big smiles, i may be penniless, but i'm rich in life!!

Hippy in love
Miss B x

Miss B's Budget Fabulous

2006-08-01T17:52:00.000+01:00

One of the hardest things Miss Black has had to deal with since beginning her money rehab, is avoiding the shops.

However, she's learned that you can still look fabulous and get the same buzz, whether you're flashing your cash on the Portobello Road or counting your coppers in Primark.

So welcome to RITNB's first feature: how to look good on a budget...

Today's Outfit:

Top - Present from mum
Belt - £1 - Primark
Skirt - free (Miss B used to work for Diesel and it was the uniform)
Necklace - £1 - Primark
Shoes - 5Op - Charity shop

TOTAL: £2.50

That's budget fabulous baby!

Start as you mean to go on...

2006-08-01T17:42:00.000+01:00

Poor Miss B! :(

She's not a v.happy bunny today. Not sure if it's the weather or the prospect of the mountain of debt to repay. Maybe she's feeling what I was feeling on Friday. Either way, there has been lots of tea and sympathy today (and frozen carrots obv!)

My day hasn't exactly been great either. Following the Statement of Doooooooom, I decided to get a credit check to see where I'm at. Da Fool are offering a 30 day free trial (http://www.fool.co.uk/debt/creditreportcentre.htm) so I gave it a whirl and my credit card was rejected...LMAO! Talk about start as you mean to go on!

I think that says it all...

Roller skating to save my sanity

2006-08-01T17:10:00.001+01:00

'its got to get better, right?' ...is what i thought as i ate around the mould of my sandwiches and waited for my cucumber to defrost. don't ask. the fridge has busted at work, i only learnt this after getting an ice headache from a carrot. the future is bright, it involves home cooking and activities that are free. me and my man have got his and hers skates, hours of fun to be had in the park surely?

fingers crossed i can get through this, of course i can, i will. will i? yes. oh jesus i'm talking to myself.

*skates away*

Denial/depression/doom. is this how being an adult was meant to be?

2006-08-01T10:49:00.000+01:00

I am in denial. Surely if I go out and spend everything will be alright? I'm quite scared that my first reaction to the fear is that buying stuff will make it ok. Have I been living life like this? Where did I learn that this is the answer to my problems? My mums a bit of a spender, maybe I think its ok cos she did. Or maybe i'm just warped.

But as my DOOOOM statement states, every month I am -£553.33 as it is. What could I possibly need to buy that will make this ok? I need to have a look at the inside. I don't think anythings missing that I can't get from a stroll in the park or a chat with a loved one. So why the need or the thinking I need material stuff?

Our generation is very materialistic. Everything is about what you've got, what you buy, wear, eat, visit, where you live, how you travel, where you drink, eat, holiday, socialise...does everything cost money??

i like a nice walk in the park with my friends. thats free.

Am i in denial? Miss Red observed that I may be in the 'depression' stage, maybe I am? There must be hope. No one can take away my walks in the park or my friends. So no matter what I have to sacrifice to sort out my finances, that is what will keep me going.

I couldn't do this without Miss Red either, I can't imagine going through this alone. That is one thing I will certainly recommend to anyone else struggling with finances, share the load. It doesnt seem half as bad when you've got someone to share it with. You can laugh and cry together then!

So its forward positive steps from here, in the hope that this dark cloud will pass...

Mouldy bread sandwiches for lunch, mmm.

Miss Red’s Statement of Doom

2006-07-31T17:42:00.000+01:00

Income Amount
Net monthly salary £1276.87
TOTAL MONTHLY INCOME £1276.87

Essential Monthly Outgoings
Mortgage: £444
Council Tax: £209 (in arrears)
Electricity: £20
Gas: £20
Water rates: £29.14
Telephone: £30
Mobile phone: £50
TV Licence: £10.96
Satellite TV: £36
Home Insurance: £49.59
Groceries: £120
Clothing: £50
Other travel: £157
Pets Insurance/Vets Bills: £10.04
Birthdays/Christmas: £25
TOTAL MONTHLY OUTGOINGS: £1,260.73
NET MONTHLY SURPLUS: £16.14

Monthly Debts

Debt / Total Debt /Min Payment /Rate
Credit Card 1 /£3,803.31 /£160 / 17.9%
Credit Card 1 / £625 / £5 / 29.9%
Personal Loan 1 / £5,103.37 / £281.65 / 27.60%
Personal Loan 2 / £4,244.24 / £181.06 / 26.9%
Student Loan / £77 / £77 / 3.20%
TOTAL DEBT: £13,852.92
TOTAL MONTHLY MIN PAYMENTS: £704.71

And that, ladies and gentleman, is why we call it the Statement of Doom. Christ.

Surprisingly, I’m not upset as I thought I would be. I knew it was bad. After all, I’m constantly overdrawn and every day brings another red letter. Not to mention the fact that I have spent the last few months unsuccessfully juggling bills and dodging calls from the plethora of companies that I owe money to.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s *bad*, but I had built it up to be so much worse than it actually is, that I can’t help but feel slightly relieved.

Besides, I always thought that I couldn’t keep up with my bills because I’d bought a CD or a top, when really, I don’t earn enough to pay my bills so there is absolutely nothing I can do. No matter how well I budget, I will never be able to pay all my bills and have enough money for myself.

At this stage, if I did pay all my bills, every penny I earn would be used and I would have nothing left for myself:

TOTAL MONTHLY INCOME: £1276.87
MONTHLY BILLS: £1,065.73
MONTHLY MIN PAYMENTS: £704.71
TOTAL: £1770.44
NET MONTHLY SURPLUS: £-493.57

So I need nearly £500 extra to pay my bills each month and then find money for myself for stuff like food (minor detail!). It’s no wonder I haven’t survived and that does make me feel slightly better.

That probably sounds ridiculous because I should be crying in a corner somewhere (or reaching for the knife like Miss B!). But surprisingly, thanks to doing this much maligned Statement of Doom, I have come through the ‘Flogging Myself’ phase and I feel a lot less angry than I did on Friday. Yes, it’s my fault, but it’s done now and I need to do something about it and make sure it never happens again.

Besides, I haven’t got to this point overnight. I’ve had years of sleepless nights. Years of cursing myself for not controlling my spending. Years of gut churning panic every time the phone rings or I hear the letterbox. Years of self-loathing and regret.

It has to stop. I can’t live like this anymore.

That’s the point of this blog. It isn’t about obstreperously berating ourselves for getting into debt; that's as futile as it is counterproductive. It’s about taking control and doing something about it that doesn’t involve getting *another* loan or credit card.

The question is now though, what can I do about it? Ahhh…there’s the rub.

Miss B : "oh shit"

2006-07-31T10:20:00.000+01:00

Oh jesus I spoke to student loans, i'd guessed I owe them around 3k, its actually £6,901.26, booo!!!

So my statement is:

TOTAL MONTHLY OUTGOINGS:
£ 1,753.33
NET MONTHLY SURPLUS:
£ -553.33

TOTAL DEBT:
£ 10,765.36

Shit.

*reaches for knife*

Miss Blacks Weekly Spend....riding my bike saved what i over spent on loo roll

2006-07-28T17:13:00.000+01:00

ok, so i kind of started it this week, but heres the full line up:

Monday -
*Fancy dress costume for The Big Chill - £25
*Lunch from the nice smiley man in the bagette shop, he gave me a free apple - £2.20
*Thai takeaway - £12
*Loo roll & cranberry juice - £3
*Oyster Card top up - £10
TOTAL - £52.20

Tuesday -
*Banana & hot water - 55p
*Lunch - sushi from boots, but ooh there was a 3 for 2 on vitamins - £15
*Big shop in Tesco - £30
TOTAL - £45.55

Wednesday -
*Brought my own lunch, so freee!
*rode my bike so freeee travel!
*had last nights left overs for tea, so freeee!
TOTAL: i am a saint!!! :o) and i found £2.05 in my bag and didnt spend it!

Thursday -
*Yoga class £8
*brought my own lunch, yay
*stayed my my boys and he fed me, yay
TOTAL: £8

Friday -
*BYOed my lunch
*seeing my brothers tonight, we're getting fish adn chips, so around £10
*meeting old school mate for a beer, hopefully not over £10!
TOTAL: £20?

weekends are gonna be the death of me...but im up for the challenge. I rang my phone company to see why my bills are always over £70, i'm a dumbo for having never asked this before. Geeze, you live and learn. Its my money, i want to know where it is, it all seems so obvious now we're doing this!!

Right, have a lovely weekend y'all, we'll be postin' our statements on monday, its time to get our hands dirty redders!

Miss B

Miss Red's Weekly Spend

2006-07-28T16:52:00.000+01:00

Monday
£1 - cup of tea @ station
40p - crisps

Tuesday
£1 - cup of tea @ station
40p - crisps

Wednesday
45p - chocolate

Thursday
Nothing!

Friday (so far)
£1 - cup of tea @ station
60p - yogurt
45p - chocolate

Total weekly spend: £5.30

Don't look back in anger?

2006-07-28T16:47:00.000+01:00

Unfortunately, I'm not feeling as positive as Miss B today. The week is drawing to a close and as I approach another weekend stuck indoors with nothing interesting to do or eat, I can feel my enthusiasm towards my rehab begin to wane.

I think coming to terms with having to change your lifestyle so drastically, is like the five stages of grief and after years of denial, I'm now entering anger…

I'm not angry at anyone else. I don't blame the bank or my upbringing for being in debt, I blame myself and I think that's a big step. I know it probably sounds obvious, but for the first time I've realised that I'm the one that got myself into this and I can't rely on consolidation loans, credit cards, overdrafts or hand outs to get me out.

It's like being on a diet. Weight Watchers will help you lose weight but until you work out why you over-eat, you'll never keep the weight off. So until I address why I can't stay in control of my finances, I will always be in debt.

There is a reason for it though, and while I wish it was something as dramatic as over-spending to compensate for something lacking in my life or a case of 'Keeping up with the Jones', it really is just down to not thinking about what I'm spending and not planning. Simple.
I have never budgeted, nor have I thought past the end of the week. I've lived the vicious circle of spending two weeks of the month living like a Queen and the other two eating baked beans every night. It happens every month and yet I never learn.

As a result, I've *wasted* money over the years. I may as well have just withdrawn all the money from account each month and had a bonfire in the back garden!

Here are just a few things I've wasted money on that have accumulated into the pile of debt I have now:

CABS - I could cry about the amount of money I've wasted on cabs. Cabs home from the station. Cabs home from the pub. Cabs home from the supermarket. I've taken cabs more than the bus! And why? Cos I'm wearing bad shoes? Cos it's raining? Cos I want to get home and watch Location, Location, Location? Or just cos I'm a lazy cow? I suspect the latter.

CHARGES - I *should* cry about the amount of money I've wasted on bank and credit card charges! 9 times out of 10 it's because of I've 'forgotten' that I've written a cheque or to cancel a direct debit or to just move money from one account to another. Ridiculous.

LUNCH - It takes approximately 5 minutes to make a sandwich the night before work yet, I'd rather spend £5 on a shitty Pret a Fucking Manger sandwich and a bag of crisps. I've bought lunch every day for 3 years, which is about £100 a month, which is £1,200 a year and that's £3,600 over three years. I could have paid off one of my credit cards with that!

ROUNDS - I only drink once in a blue moon so when I go to the pub, I usually just have mineral water. However, I somehow manage to get sucked into doing 'rounds' and end up buying 3 pints of beer and a rum and Coke! Why is it so hard for me to say, 'Count me out, I'm having water'?? I doubt anyone would care. It's not like I've asked them to murder a playground full of children. Fool.

TREATING PEOPLE - 'I'll get this' or 'My treat' are things I say on a regular basis. Whether it's not taking any money off someone for a Flake I just bought them at the shop or offering to pay for lunch or dinner. WTF is that all about? Obviously, I have *loads* of money and can afford to do this on a regular basis! Yet when anyone offers to do it for me, I always feel bad and say no.

FOOD - Ahhhh, but we need food, right? Of course we do. But do we need the two bags of salad that I buy every Saturday and then throw in the bin every Thursday? And do we need 3 for 2 on yogurt that goes out of date the next day? And do we need to buy food cos it has nice packaging? How about deciding what you want to eat, writing a list and then going to the supermarket and buying it? Radical I know.

PRODUCTS - By products I mean of course, anything in Boots. Do I need 4 shampoos? Do I need 17 eyeshadows? Do I need a bubble bath for every day of the week? Of course not. But do I have 4 shampoos? Do I have 17 eyeshadows? Do I have a bubble bath for every day of the week? Of course I do.

FLOWERS - Yes, they're lovely around the house but who am I? Elton fucking John?

CDs - Buying an album cos you like one song and then realising the rest of the album is shit. Brilliant.

CLOTHES - Don't try it on, buy it, get it home, realise you hate it, never wear it again. Every fucking time.

HANDBAGS - I'm sorry. I was too hasty. It's too soon. I need every last one of my handbags. Sorry.

Trust me, when you're drowning in about £15k's worth of debt and then realise you've wasted it on that lot, you have no choice but to be angry. And now I have to do the Statement of Doom...joy!

Miss R x

Can't put a price on love. Its a rich mans world, to quote Abba.

2006-07-28T11:10:00.000+01:00

Why is it that this is all i'm thinking about now?! Everything seems to involve money, everything!! Any conversation i have.

RANDOM COLLEAGUE: 'How was your night?'
MISS B: 'Good thanks, we walked the dog, (cue cheap money gag, cheap, geddit?!) at least its a free night out!'
RC: 'oh yeah, erm, what are you doing this weekend?'
MB: 'An overtime shift, extra money, yay!'
*RC backs away half smiling*

Maybe people can't get on the wavelength if they're not counting the pennies too, or maybe she earns more than me and doesnt need to, bitch.

There is definately a facade around money, i'm guilty of it myself. If you don't mention it, it appears you've got it, and therefore you are given more respect. My pal with the expensive taste is a recent graduate, so can't be in a dissimilar place to me financially. And yet he lives the life of a born and bred sloane. I can actually see him getting a ridiculously well paid job because of this. Its almost that because of his lifestyle, this facade of wealth, class, family money, whatever it is, he will be treated as 'one of them' and therefore live the life on the 'other side'!! I should know, i see it daily living in Notting Hill.

Its another world, i do love it, but its not real. There must be half the population just 'keeping up with appearances', not everyone can do lunch, walk a poodle and have their nails done for a living, surely?

I like the idea of living like Carrie in Sex in the City. Eating an apple in my knickers and heels whilst lying on my silk bed linen at my i-mac, writing indepth about the subtext of third date jewelerry choices. But its not real.

My real life, is, I imagine, very similar to most other peoples real life. Working bloody hard to pay bills, scrapping by on bargains, cheap nights out/in, a constant struggle (especially approaching payday) and exciting treats coming in the form of something like, a nice yoghurt. But I do have a lovely time. I love my friends, am really close to my family, we're all in the same boat, and yet we always have brilliant times. I never want for anything, honestly!!

Moneys funny isn't it, no matter what you earn its never enough. I've got friends in massively well paid jobs, who still, come that vital week before payday are scrapping the pennies to buy lunch. Once you earn more, you want more, your overheads go up, you spend more on food, drink, lifestyle, clothes, holidays...its never ending. And really whats it all worth if you can't share it, be truely happy, you as you, Gucci suit or H&M jeans?

What is it that bonds us all as people, even if we do earn such unequal amounts? Well surely its in love, loving and being loved in return. That, my friends, is free. Ain't no one putting a price on the amount of love i have for my man. Its him I want to share it all with, he makes me smile just holding my hand. We can take the dog for a walk (free!! hurrah!) and have an 8 million times better night than i've had in swanky over priced bars, or the buzz of spending shit loads on beautiful new clothes.

This is how i know its all going to be alright. Obviously i am in shit loads of debt, but i feel like i can do anything, take on anything, because of him. Call me a hippy in love, laugh at me, throw stones, make jokes, i care not, for i am in love!! Haaa, re-reading that its hilarious!! Sorry, this blog has taken an unplanned tangent. But clearly something that I needed to get out! Thanks to this fabulous form of communication that we can share in such a way!

Gawd bless the blog. And gawd bless love, for it is love that will last when all the debts have been paid, and then my friends, we can save and SPEND!!! (within a strictly allocated budget.)

Have yourselves a merry little weekend. I too am shitting it about the doom log. But the time has come to get this down on paper, face our fears, do the maths, and giggle as we eat 6p beans! Thanks for being with us as we share our stories, its really helping believe me.

Peace out,
Miss B

Ahhhh...the Statement of Doom!

2006-07-27T16:37:00.000+01:00

As Miss B just mentioned in her entry, the time for us has come to write our 'Statement of Doom'...dum, dum, dum!

A 'Statement of Doom' as we call it, is actually a Statement of Affairs and according to da Fool (http://www.fool.co.uk/debt/articles/soacalc.htm) we can't begin to work out a plan of action, without knowing exactly how much we owe.

It makes sense, but if you don't like to open your post, like me, and you never check your bank balance cos it's never good news, it's a scary prospect.

But it needs to be done and we're going to work on it this weekend, then post it here for all the world to see on Monday...eep!

Wish us luck!

Miss Red x

red is the new black

we're not dead

Hair care is the new black

lunch and sky for freeeeeeee!!!wweeeeeeeee!!!

Miss Blacks Weekly Spend....

Miss Red's Weekly Spend - w/beg Sept 23rd

Good advice: Britons in most debt

Is it safe?

ok, the bitch is back...

Welcome to Tie Dye is the New Black!

We *heart* Maya Angelou & Patricia Lynn Reilly

The future of the blog...

dont read on if you're freaked out by 'lady things'

Good Advice: Groucho Marx

1 MONTH BITCHES!

i'm a new woman.its amazing what a trip to boots can do.

*wonders if going mad*

As I've been so bad...

Miss Red's Weekly Spend - w/beg Sept 16th

Miss B's Weekly Spend - w/beg Sept 16th

Day 24: Get thee behind me nicotine!

Good Advice: Marilyn Monroe

Day 22: I'm back bitches!

bullshit debt advice

What use is Victoria Newton to the human race?

LIFE IS GOOD!!

Day 16: Still in a good mood...

Are we broke cos we like Kylie?

Greedy Bitch

Screw you Starbucks!

Day 15: WTF?!

disco trainee!

Poor the Miss B!

MUM is ME

Miss Blacks Weekly Spend....

Miss Red's Weekly Spend - w/beg Sept 4th

teenage mutant hero miss black!

A big thank you to Metro...

Sharing the Love...

Day 14: COME ON!

Day 10: I'm blue :(

Good Advice: Del Boy Trotter

Day 9: Who you callin' bitch?

way to break the world record for the biggest fancy dress party ever!

the joys of a delightful frog hot water bottle

Wentworth Miller: PUBLIC HEALTH WARNING

Day 8: COCKminster

Day 7: IN YOUR FACE CANCER!

Happy Birthday Freddie!

Good Advice: Free Eye Tests

fucking money

pink i pod lesbians

a dog on a chair

wakeboarding boyfriend

how did i end up in a sex shop?

Flowers for Freddie Mercury

Oxfam is your friend

Day 6: Thank God for Wentworth Miller...

Miss Red's Weekly Spend - w/beg Aug 28th

Miss B's Budget Fabulous - Sept 1st

Day 3 - Fuck eBay

Hungover with Freddie Ljungberg

Good Advice: Prada v/s Primark

Day 2: Not killed anyone...yet...

Good Advice: Oscar Wilde

Miss B's Budget Fabulous - Aug 30th

Day 1: My Nicotine Hell

Haircuts for vodka, has it come to this?

Primark we salute you!

knitting with an american bulldog as foot rest!

Not much to say really...

NEW: The RITNB eBay Shop!

a GAY night, always the death of me

Good Advice: Carrie Bradshaw

Come on Karma! Throw me a bone…

Remember me?

Miss B's Budget Fabulous - Aug 17th

yes it's payday, but i'm NOT rich!

spend a penny? i spent a few, oops.

Smell the stilton?

We heart Maya Angelou & Patricia Lynn Reilly

wonders if going mad